Screen Playing

THU 10/14

It’s a tenet that we in Houston understand all too well: Austin, as our cooler,
hipper sibling, puts on the best festivals. First South By Southwest, then the
Austin Film Festival. Why, it’s almost unfair. But there’s no reason to shun
these shindigs — especially this week’s Austin Film Festival — out of jealousy.
In its 11th year, the annual event is spotlighting screenwriters rather than
actors. If you’ve ever fancied yourself a moviemaker, the fest’s conferences,
which run from Thursday through Sunday at the Driskill and Stephen F. Austin
hotels, are the place to be. “You get fewer of the satisfying anecdotes that
come from actors, perhaps,” says featured panelist John Lee Hancock, who wrote
and directed the recent historical blockbuster, The Alamo. “But you get
more nuts and bolts about how a film is conceived.” Not that there’s a shortage
of celebs: Funnyman Garry Shandling, fresh off his Emmy hosting gig, and director
Barry Levinson are slated as panelists.

The three-hour roadtrip will be worth Houstonians’ while, as more than 100
films will be screened in eight days at several Austin theaters. Drop $42.50
and you’ll get a pass to every film, including premieres of such big-budget
flicks as The Street and American Brown, a Bollywood showcase
and a slew of documentary and short flicks. Or, shell out the big bucks (call
ahead for prices) and you’ll score an all-access pass to every panel discussion,
screening and schmoozefest party, like the filmmakers’ happy hour, where you
can rub elbows with Shandling and Levinson and pitch next year’s big blockbuster
— written and starring, natch, yourself. The Austin Film Festival opens Thursday,
October 14, and runs through October 21 at various venues. For information,
call 800-310-3378 or visit www.austinfilmfestival.com.
Prices start at $42.50; $35 for students. — Steven Devadanam

Rome Around

Houston’s best ethnic festival? Fuggedaboudit! Festa Italiana rubs
out the competition every year in a sea of tomato sauce and ricotta cheese.
This year’s event will be laid out like a street festival in a “quaint Italian
village,” lined with mountains of hand-prepared food. Other highlights include
the grape-stomping contest, live Italian music bands (including the Rat Pack
Review — swingin’!) and a car show featuring Fiats, Alfa Romeos and
Ferraris. And Sunday morning’s events start with a Catholic Mass — what better
place to confess your sins from Saturday night? 11 a.m. to 11 p.m. Saturday,
October 16, and 11 a.m. to 8 p.m. Sunday, October 17. Houston Farm & Ranch Club,
One Abercrombie Drive. For information, call 713-524-4222 or visit www.houstonitalianfestival.com.
$5 for adults; free for children 12 and under. — Bob Ruggiero

Et Tu, Crouton?

FRI 10/15

Strange to think that a patch of romaine lettuce covered in a blend of Parmesan
cheese, anchovies and lemon juice could cause such a commotion, but apparently
Caesar-salad-lovin’ camps are so polarized that an annual throwdown is needed
to appease them. This weekend’s 20th annual Caesar Salad Competition, featuring
chefs from the chic eateries Pesce, River Oaks Grill, Brennan’s and 14 other
restaurants, should leave you entertained, if not decisive. Participating chefs
have done everything in past years from mixing unique cocktails to enlisting
shot girls to draw people to their booths in hopes of winning the coveted “consumers’
choice” award. And according to one attendee, there’s been some smack-talking
in the past, too. What, are they threatening to bruise each other’s lettuce?
5 p.m. to 8 p.m. Friday, October 15. Doubletree Hotel Allen Center, 400 Dallas.
For information, call 713-609-5510. $25. — Julia Ramey

Tut and Comin’
Arthur Phillips gets naughty and nice in The Egyptologist

THU 10/14

Referring to the number of sperm contained in a single ejaculation, legendary
Houston comedian Bill Hicks once observed, “I’ve tossed universes in my underpants.
While napping.” There’s a similar autoerotic creation myth at the center of
Arthur Phillips’s new novel, The Egyptologist. Its titular antihero ferrets
out the tomb of Atum-hadu (translation: “Atum-Is-Aroused”), a king named after
an onanistic Egyptian god whose, um, “big bang” created the universe. While
Phillips’s hugely successful debut novel, Prague, dealt with present-day
anxieties, the new one plops the reader squarely in the early 1920s, with narrative
tentacles reaching forward and into the past. This week Phillips reads from
The Egyptologist at Brazos Bookstore; expect heavily fictionalized Middle
Eastern history, incorrigible wordplay (“this is no continent for the incontinent”),
romance and the occasional penis joke. Phillips appears with author Dan Chaon
at 7 p.m. Thursday, October 14. 2421 Bissonnet. For information, call
713-523-0701 or visit www.brazosbookstore.com.
Free. — Scott Faingold

Sunning and Shopping

This weekend you can work on your tan while getting a jump on that Christmas list. Snoop around booths featuring more than 100 regional artists who’ll be peddling jewelry, watercolors, hand-crafted furniture and pottery at Galveston’s ARToberFEST. This year’s event features work by students from the University of Houston and area high schools. Stroll the arts district and get mellow with South American chill music courtesy of the Andean New Age Players. Festival proceeds go to local charities, including the AIDS Coalition of Coastal Texas. 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Saturday, October 16, and 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Sunday, October 17. Postoffice Street, between 21st and 23rd streets, Galveston. For information, visit www.artoberfest.com. $3; free for children 12 and under. — Greg Barr