I guess people really care about this whole royal baby being born. The media can’t get enough of it, social media is bonkers, even my own husband whose motto in life is wishing that everyone will “go die in a fire,” said, “Well it’s exciting because of the lineage.” Nobody felt that way when Drew Barrymore had her baby.

I feel bad for the kid. His life is just going to be a series of Daily Mail covers and E! News speculations. But he will also be obscenely rich and have access to the best schools in the world and have the opportunity to travel to places you and I can only dream of and do basically whatever he wants so, there’s that too.

The best part about yesterday’s waiting game for the Prince and Duchess to ascend upon the street was following along on Twitter as it all played out. People had something interesting things to say about this whole shebang that can only be said in 140 characters.

Finally a new social media that has some staying power. It’s either that or ravens.

Thank God for you! I’m sure skin care is something on every new mother’s mind; marketing at its best.

I do not see any reason why we should not do this. Zayn it is, good sir.

Silly robot. Pleasured is what happens before the baby. Now that they have a baby “pleasured” is a distant dream.

Good advice from Andrew WK right there.

Sara Cox, the WASP man like White Anglo-Saxon Protestant? No, this baby is a part of the Church of England.

Ha ha. I read that joke maybe no less than 50 times on Twitter. And then William even made it himself and it was even less funny.

Good. I thought they were going to be total snobs and blow this whole thing off like they did with North West.

Of course. Oreo comes in second place in every competition cookie or otherwise, except “best cookie to eat when you are high.” That’s Chewy Chips Ahoy (so I’ve been told).

Kate has basically ruined it for every new mother out there who doesn’t immediately look amazing and happy several hours after giving birth. Thanks princess!

What if the new royal baby was also Harry Potter? OMG, I think the entire UK would implode with excitement.

And we are here waiting with bated breath for any small bit of vomit you will embark upon us. Signed, your humble servants.

What do you think this is, The Real Wives of the United Kingdom?

I actually cannot imagine that. I tried. Sorry.

Calling him “Carlos Danger” would be less of a dig at Anthony Weiner and more of an insult to the royal baby.