Thursday, April 22

Today swinging couples from all over the nation will, um, converge at Live
Oak Resort for Hedo-Fest ’04, a four-day festival of nudity, networking
and gang-banging. “Hedo-Fest ’04 is a gathering of open-minded couples interested
in exploring their sexuality in a secure, private resort,” says Larry Hilderbrand,
one of the owners of Live Oak, the largest clothing-optional resort in Texas.
Bounce-friendly events like nude volleyball should keep things on the up-and-up,
but try not to exert yourself too much during the day. You want to be ready
for the all-night toga parties. John Belushi never had it so good. 5 p.m. today,
through Sunday, April 25. 9751 Lone Star Road in Washington. For information,
call 936-878-2216 or visit www.liveoakresort.com.
$150 per couple per day; $350 per couple for all four days.

Friday, April 23

Okay, last night was a big mistake. You thought you and your beloved could
handle a little experimentation, a little spice, but you were dead wrong. Now
you’re driving back to town, with lips closed, eyes straight ahead, wondering
if your relationship can ever be the same. But before you get out your cell
phone and start making calls to your therapist (or your lawyer), you should
step back and put things in perspective. Head down to G-town and check out the
East-End Theatre Company’s production of Sam Shepard’s Fool for Love.
It’s all about a half-brother and half-sister who hang out in a hotel room,
talk about their folks and, um, let’s just say they take sibling bonding to
a new level. After seeing this play together, maybe you and your lover can go
to bed with clear consciences. After all, at least all those people from Hedo-Fest
weren’t related to you. 8 p.m. today. Through May 9. 2001 Postoffice in Galveston.
For a full schedule, call 409-762-3556 or visit www.islandetc.com.
$17 to $45.

Danish director Lone Sherfig made a name for himself on the international cinema scene with Italian for Beginners, a tale of loneliness and romance. Now he’s back with the story of two brothers, Harbour and Wilbur, who must cope with the death of their father. Harbour starts looking for love while Wilbur, well, Wilbur Wants to Kill Himself. The film opens today at 11:50 a.m. Angelika Film Center, 510 Texas. For information, call 713-333-3456 or visit www.angelikafilmcenter.com. $8.

Saturday, April 24

The folks of Bobbindoctrin Puppet Theatre are freaks — and that’s why we love
them so. You can help support the noble cause of bizarre puppetry tonight at
Bobbindoctrin’s Forsaken Carny, an evening of beers, hot dogs, fire dancers
and live music. Dress code, of course, is bumpkin casual. 8 p.m. Commerce Street
Artists Warehouse, 2315 Commerce. For information, call 713-526-7434 or visit
www.bobbindoctrin.org. $20.

Or, if imitating modern-day drifters isn’t really your thing, head over to Gallery Row on Colquitt for a night of art openings. New Gallery (713-520-7053) presents “Gordon Terry: Black Holes, Bohemians, Colonials, and Boudoirs,” an exhibition of paintings awash in swirls of color. Over at Hooks-Epstein Galleries (713-522-0718), you’ll get “Blown,” a display of contemporary art glass sure to please any stoner in the group. Moody Gallery (713-526-9911) brings it with “Dark Horse,” a selection of works by Helen Altman, while John Cleary Gallery (713-524-5070) presents the photography of Jeffrey Conley in “Earth Elements.” And don’t forget Goldesberry Gallery (713-528-0405), where ceramic works by Sharon Dennard are being billed as “Exercises of the Soul.” With five openings on one street at the same time, you might finally be able to catch a buzz from those little cups of wine. 6 p.m. to 8 p.m. 2600 block of Colquitt. Free.

Sunday, April 25

We love MacGyver. That dude could take a roll of duct tape and turn it into
a helicopter. You can tap into your own inner handyman/secret-agent today at
Project Row Houses for Worldwide Pinhole Photography Day. With a mere
one-quart can, you’ll devise a low-tech device for tracking the moves of the
enemy. Afterward, the results will be submitted to the organizers of WPPD by
means of a high-tech network of wires and cables, code name: the Internet. No
duct tape required. Noon. 2500 Holman. For information, call 713-526-7662 or
visit www.pinholeday.org. Free.

Monday, April 26

How long’s it been since you called in sick? Well, partner, that’s too long.
Mondays are much better when they come on Tuesdays, so muffle your voice, start
hacking, whisper an excuse to your boss and hit the Houston Zoo. That’s
right, the zoo. The fresh air will do you good, and this time of year the heat
hasn’t quite hit, so both you and the animals can come out and play. If you’re
lucky, you just might get to see a newborn elephant. Shanti, the zoo’s 13-year-old
Asian elephant, has been overdue for a couple of weeks. The folks at the zoo
tell us that her blood serum contains 0.58 nanograms of progesterone per millimeter.
We have no idea what the hell that means, but they assure us it’s a sign that
her big-eared babe could pop out any day now. 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. daily. 1513 North
MacGregor. For information, call 713-533-6500 or visit www.houstonzoo.com.
$3 to $7.

Tuesday, April 27

Apparently the folks over at Cabo Montrose are having trouble attracting the
GLBT crowd. It must be the location. After all, how can they expect to attract
gays and lesbians when they’re smack-dab in the middle of the queerest district
in town? Hmm”whatever. But at least they’re working on it. They’ve just hired
Nancy Ford, H-town’s premier lesbian comedienne, in the hopes that she’ll
help lure some of the ladies from Chances Bar across the street. Ford plays
guitar every Tuesday evening, cracking jokes and telling tales of loves lost
and licked. 7 p.m. 1111 Westheimer. For information, call 713-942-2226 or visit
www.cabomixmex.com. Free.

Wednesday, April 28

Your baby ain’t sweet like G. Love’s. And your band probably isn’t anywhere
near as cool as G. Love and Special Sauce. Blending hip-hop, blues, funk
and folk, Garrett Dutton III (a.k.a. G. Love) seems to change his lyrics every
time he takes the stage. It’s what fans have come to expect from this former
Philadelphia street musician (and reputed pothead). 8 p.m. Numbers, 300 Westheimer.
For information, call 713-526-6551 or visit www.numbersnightclub.com.
$15 to $17.