Tunnel Mole Finds Underground Economy Getting Nervous
They say you haven’t made it ’til you’ve been on YouTube, or had a crazed fan kill themselves in front of one of your houses, but I am disconsolate to admit that apparently, I’ve made it. No deaths, thankfully. Somehow, some freakin’ idiot put me up on the Internets. Keep…
He Got His Fraud Conviction Through The Houston Chronicle
If the people you rip off are people who are seeking to themselves rip off the federal government, where’s the harm? Don’t ask that of Christopher Brian McPherson. He just got five years in a federal prison for seeking the answer to that question. McPherson plead guilty to a fraud…
Happy Birthday, Shakey
As one of rock’s premier songwriters, guitarists and even vocalists – that reedy tenor grows on you, big-time – Neil Young’s body of work is second only to Bob Dylan’s in terms of quality-to-amount ratio. But Young, who turns 63 today, is and has been many other things: cerebral-palsy activist,…
Book Review: The Longest, Dullest Trip Home
John Grogan’s Marley and Me sold millions of copies and, as you probably have heard, has been made into a film starring Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson that will be hitting theaters soon. Many people of refined tastes no doubt saw the 2005 memoir about a man and his incorrigible…
Cutout Bin: Nick DiFonzo’s New Column
[Ed. Note: This is a new weekly Rocks Off column by Nick DiFonzo, author of Seriously Bad Album Covers and keeper of bizarrerecords.com. Enjoy.] Ratchell, II (Decca, 1972) Fake Band Bio (clockwise from top left): Zach (guitar): Plays well but is always late for practice, and usually shows up stoned…
Obama Inauguration Tickets — Hotter Than Hannah Montana and The Jonas Brothers Combined
If you’re thinking about heading to Washington, D.C. for the Obama Inauguration, it’s getting late. Hotel rooms are all but gone, unless you want to have a very long drive. (We like the fan who spent $1 million to reserve an entire 300-room Marriott. You probably get a lot of…
HISD Gets A New Media Guru
It took a while, but the Houston school district has apparently found someone to fill the shows of departed media spokesman Terry Abbott. The bad news is the new guy comes from Clear Channel, which is the hated monster of independent-minded radio fans everywhere. The good news is he comes…
Slideshow: Latin Grammys Pre-Party at House of Blues
Mark C. Austin Singer Frankie J and many other Texas Latin music luminaries walked the red carpet Tuesday night at the Texas Chapter of the Recording Academy’s Latin Grammys pre-party at House of Blues. Click here for a slideshow. – Chris Gray…
Caja China: The Cuban Pig Roaster
I stopped to admire what looked like a charcoal grill loaded with fajita meat and tortillas while checking out the tailgating action at Reliant a couple of weeks ago. But Mariano Moreno, the grill chef, threw me a curve ball. If you look closely at the grill in the photo…
Embrace The Inflatable Ads, Houston
Houston has a new acronym — AGDs, or Attention-Getting Devices. These are the inflatable gorillas, dogs, whatevers that festoon car dealerships and cel-phone stores all over town, because apparently drivers slam on the brakes and put down $20K on a car if they see a big blue gorilla. The City…
Artist of the Week: Debbie Forrest
Each Wednesday, Rocks Off arbitrarily appoints one lucky local performer or group “Artist of the Week,” bestowing upon them all the fame and grandeur such a lofty title implies. Know a band or artist that isn’t awful? Email their particulars to introducingliston@gmail.com. Americana music, a generalized catchall that we’ve taken…
Get Lit: The Pitchfork 500
At last, Pitchfork has laid bare its aesthetic in book form in this old-media attempt at pop music canonization. As the cover describes, The Pitchfork 500 is “Our Guide to the Greatest Songs from Punk to the Present,” beginning with singles released in 1977. That Pitchfork chieftains Scott Plagenhof and…
Wii Will, Wii Will Sue You
Hey all you Wii fanatics, sitting out there happily glazy-eyed, thinking you’re actually exercising, thinking the Japanese must be freakin’ genuises (genuiiii?) for inventing this thing — you’re wrong. You’re wrong because a) Happiness shouldn’t come from an electronic bowling game; b) It ain’t exercise; and c) they didn’t invent…
Empty Seats at Texans Games Only Way to Hurt McNair
I’ve got a little something that I want to get off my chest. It’s something I’ve been reading from the Chron’s John McClain for the past month or so. He’s angry with people who don’t use their Texans tickets and leave the stadium empty. It shows we’re bad fans, he…
Empty Seats at Texans Games Only Way to Hurt McNair
I’ve got a little something that I want to get off my chest. It’s something I’ve been reading from the Chron’s John McClain for the past month or so. He’s angry with people who don’t use their Texans tickets and leave the stadium empty. It shows we’re bad fans, he…
Balls…Hair Balls: Bond’s Best Five Non-Villain Deaths
Along with shaken martinis, Walther PPKs, and Aston-Martins, the James Bond franchise is know for numerous and — at times — hilarious deaths. We’ll take a look at the demises of the various evil masterminds a little later, but for now here are some of the more memorable non-villain deaths…
The Bolivar Ferry Is Back, Baby
It’s back! As of six o’clock this morning, service on the Bolivar Ferry has resumed. The biggest job in getting the boats back in service wasn’t any damage to the ships themselves; rather it was dredging a bay that had been transformed by Ike. There was minor damage to boats…
R.I.P. Miriam Makeba
The first song I ever heard Miriam Makeba sing was Bob Dylan’s “I Shall Be Released.” It was off of a scratchy old album I found at a friend’s house and, for me, it was a life-changing experience. I’d never been much of a Dylan fan, but Makeba’s soulful rendition…
New York Prof Says KIPP Isn’t a Magic Bullet; KIPP Founder Says, Hey You’re Right
A just-released report from a New York City prof warns that while KIPP – the Knowledge Is Power Program operated in non-profit charter schools in cities across the country including Houston — does many good things, it should not be adopted as a role model for changes in public schools…
Aftermath: The Revival Tour at Walter’s on Washington
l-r: Tim Barry, Chuck Ragan, Ben Nichols Photos by Craig Hlavaty The Revival Tour is the kind of tour that keeps little beer companies like Texas’ own Lone Star in business. And it’s no accident that, not even an hour into the show Monday night, the bar at Walter’s ran…
Veteran’s Day In Houston
It was a thin crowd at the Veteran’s Day program on the steps of City Hall this morning. Maybe it was the steady drizzle of rain that kept folks away, maybe it was the country’s current anti-war sentiment. Some politico types were there including John Cornyn, Anise Parker and Shelia…
Tonight: Shontelle at House of Blues
From Kris “Me and Bobby McGee” Kristofferson through The “Umbrella” Dream, countless artists have begun their careers as songwriters before stepping out into the footlights on their own. Meet the latest: Barbados native Shontelle, whose I’m-a-long-way-from-over-you R&B ballad “T-Shirt” cracked the Top 20 of Billboard’s Pop 100 Airplay chart this…
A City’s Shame: Inflatable Gorillas
The Houston City Council, having solved every other conceivable problem — be it Ike-related or not — is now tackling the important issues. Like giant, inflatable gorillas. The city wants to ban the giant blow-up animals that dot used-car lots all over town, because apparently those things are all that…
Slideshow: Fun Fun Fun Fest in Austin’s Waterloo Park
Jay Lee Rocks Off sent shutterbug Jay Lee to Houston’s far northwestern suburbs last weekend to check out the third annual punk and indie-rock extravaganza Fun Fun Fun Fest in Austin’s Waterloo Park. Click here for a slideshow. – Chris Gray…
Houston’s Darque Tan, Leading The Fight Against Cancer
Here’s some news you can use, assuming you believe the word of Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott — tanning beds don’t prevent cancer. Abbott filed an injunction Monday against Houston-based Darque Tan (here’s a copy of it) accusing it of false advertising. False advertising? For the kind of people who…
Bring Out Your Dead (Popes)
Hey, kids, the Popemobile is coming to town!! (Pope not included.) Houston’s very own Museum of Funeral History (Motto: “Slightly More Popular Than Houston’s Museum of Printing History”) is putting on an elaborate exhibit on how popes get funeralized. As part of it, the museum announced, an actual Popemobile (used…
Purslane: Eating Weeds
Verdolaga is the name of a winter green I found at a stall in the produce terminal on Airline. At first, I thought it was watercress. Since I had never eaten verdolaga before, I bought a bunch for a dollar and a half and took it home along with a…
A Veterans’ Day Montage: Dixie Chicks, the Clash, Johnny Cash, Glen Campbell, Pogues and More
Ninety years ago today, in a railroad car in Northern France, representatives from Germany and the Allied Powers signed an armistice agreement to cease hostilities in what was then known as the “War to end all wars.” That lasted until Hitler’s Wehrmacht rolled into Poland, and ever since, as we…
Balls…Hair Balls: Bond’s Five Best Henchmen
The new Bond movies have been praised by some for taking a more realistic approach, but one of the things we miss about the films of yore is the array of goofy underlings making 007’s life a constant pain in the ass. From the sinister (Red Grant) to the senseless…
Who Cares About You and Your 400 Kids?
Hey, want to watch something fun on television? How about this show where these lunatics who decided to have 20 kids chase after them and talk about how challenging it is to have 20 kids? Sounds…awful, right? So answer me this, why are such shows as Jon and Kate Plus…
Tuesday Morning Quarterbacking: Well, It Could Be Worse
I hate to say I told you so, but…I told you so on Saturday. I said the Texans would lose big. I said they would get fooled on the trick plays. The Texans lost to the Baltimore Ravens 41-13 on Sunday. They got burned on some trick plays. They couldn’t…
Tuesday Morning Quarterbacking: Well, It Could Be Worse
I hate to say I told you so, but…I told you so on Saturday. I said the Texans would lose big. I said they would get fooled on the trick plays. The Texans lost to the Baltimore Ravens 41-13 on Sunday. They got burned on some trick plays. They couldn’t…
HISD Keeps Giving Money To Neil Bush
In case you were wondering whether HISD’s love affair with the Bushes would end with an Obama victory, you have your answer — it won’t. On the board agenda for Wednesday is an item to spend $350,000 more on Ignite!, the computer-learning company founded by Neil Bush through the kindness…
Tonight: Michael Hardie and Milton Hopkins at Red Cat Jazz Cafe
It takes a lot of nerve to call your CD Waiting for Perfection, even when the featured guitarist’s bona fides are as untouchable as they come. Milton Hopkins has played with Little Richard and Sam Cooke, among many others, spent a decade shoring up B.B. King’s licks and just happens…
Who Are The Turkeys Of The Year?
November brings with it thoughts of Thanksgiving, and Thanksgiving brings with it thoughts of the annual Turkey of the Year competition. Each year Houston’s best and brightest battle it out for the right to be named the ultimate Turkey of the Year, or at the very least a turkey in…
Representative Al Green Fights His Own Vietnam War
Bold stands are the order of the day, and U.S. Rep. Al Green is right on the front line. Fighting the Vietnam War. Green has issued a press release bringing notice to the fact that he’s against the Vietnamese government opening a consulate here in Houston. “The Vietnamese government has…
Lonesome Onry and Mean: Roasting the Latest Best In Texas
Hickoids, “Hee Haw/Green Acres”… now this is Texas music. After watching The Hickoids’ instore at Cactus on Saturday, I took my belly full of Saint Arnold’s across the street to 59 Diner for a late-afternoon breakfast. Scanning the racks near the door for reading material, I picked up copies of…
Ike-Response Hearings Begin; FEMA Doesn’t Bother To Show Up
The first of four House Select Committee on Hurricane Ike hearings kicked off this morning at the University of Houston Hilton Hotel. Chaired by Rep. Sylvester Turner (we like to call these the “Ike-Turner” hearings), the Committee’s goal, as explained by Turner, “is to come out of these hearings with…
Cinderella Time At Mount Carmel High
Mount Carmel High School looked like it was about to close earlier this year. The Archdiocese of Galveston-Houston could no longer afford to keep it open after 52 years. The Houston school district came in and agreed to partner with Mount Carmel as a charter school and the doors stayed…
Chile Pequin Season
This is the time of year when chile pequins turn up in Mexican markets and grocery stores. The tiny chile grows wild throughout southern Texas and northern Mexico. Because its seeds are spread by birds rather than cultivation, pequins are considered the oldest chiles in North America–all of the cultivated…
A Mutt, Just Like Obama
We’ve always wondered about the provenance of our one-and-a-half year old dog, Maggie. That she defines mutt there can be no doubt: my wife picked her out from a litter of Heights pups that were to the canine world what the UN is to humans. Now, thanks to a Tennessee…
Houston Gamer Still Causing Worldwide Angst
Houston (possibly) is bringing forth the world’s ire, yet again. This time it’s a British member of parliament railing against an online game called “Kaboom — The Suicide Bomber Game” which the Daily Mail says was invented by “an anonymous man from Houston, Texas.” “Players move a terrorist of Arab…
Turning the Screw: DZA, Trae, Al Sharpton, Common, Beyonce, Akon, Mos Def, Vanilla Ice and a Whole Lotta Obama
Welcome back to Turning the Screw, Rocks Off’s weekly rap post. It probably won’t rhyme, at least most of the time. E-mail tips to introducingliston@gmail.com. Thanks, homies. Single of the Week: DZA, “Nuthin’ 2 a Boss (Remix)” Wire To Wire Trae’s new mixtape, Street Advocate, is dope. Pick it up…
Balls…Hair Balls: The Top Five Bond Girl Names
To commemorate the premiere of Quantum of Solace this week, Hair Balls will be bringing you a week of 007-related lists that will hopefully get you all amped up to go see the movie opening day and buy lots of the products featured therein. Brought to you by Bollinger Champagne…
ICE Raids Getting Flack
You’d think that deporting felons would get you a round of applause. Well, not if you’re in Houston. Local U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement officials announced last week that they returned almost 15,800 undocumented workers to their home countries during the last fiscal year. Of those, 48% had previous criminal…
Over the Weekend: Special Bikini Edition
Even though temperatures are dropping, a rare confluence of events has prompted a double bill of bikini coverage over here at Hair Balls. We swear it wasn’t intentional. 12:30 a.m. at Bikini Beach We had no idea this Clear Lake joint existed till Bill Olive sent us a round of…
Sorry, UH Cougars. You Need to Go Down.
I’ve been lamenting all season the inability of the Houston Cougars to put together a complete game, which to me is the reason they came into Saturday’s game against Tulane at 4-4 on the season, instead of 5-3 or 6-2. So the Cougars came out on Saturday and did what…
Sorry, UH Cougars. You Need to Go Down.
I’ve been lamenting all season the inability of the Houston Cougars to put together a complete game, which to me is the reason they came into Saturday’s game against Tulane at 4-4 on the season, instead of 5-3 or 6-2. So the Cougars came out on Saturday and did what…
Art Rock: Johnny Romano Tribute at Continental Club
Note: See here for a preview of the show and here for Johnny Romano’s full story. Poster by Uncle Charlie…
Today: We Are Devo! Author at Domy Books
There is a lot more to Devo than whips and silly hats. Other than the band, no one knows this better than Jade Dellinger, co-author of the book We Are Devo!: Deviants in a Post-Modern World. (Currently, it’s the only biography about the post-punk/New Wave pioneers.) “It’s sort of about…
Texans-Ravens: Just Why Exactly Is Houston Favored to Win?
Despite losing 28-21 to the Minnesota Vikings last week, and despite losing starting quarterback Matt Schaub for about four weeks, and despite losing leading tackler Zac Diles for the season, and despite playing the team with the NFL’s second-ranked defense, the Houston Texans are still favored to defeat the Baltimore…
Texans-Ravens: Just Why Exactly Is Houston Favored to Win?
Despite losing 28-21 to the Minnesota Vikings last week, and despite losing starting quarterback Matt Schaub for about four weeks, and despite losing leading tackler Zac Diles for the season, and despite playing the team with the NFL’s second-ranked defense, the Houston Texans are still favored to defeat the Baltimore…
Tonight: Gary Nicholson at Dosey Doe
Gary Nicholson and Lee Roy Parnell, “Tin Pan South” Nashville Hall of Fame songwriter Gary Nicholson celebrates his birthday tonight at Dosey Doe in the Woodlands. Nicholson is known primarily as a songwriter, having had more than 450 different songs cut by an ridiculous array of artists across almost all…
You Not Only Get An Aggie Degree, You Get A George W. Bush Speech!
If it wasn’t for Texas A&M, President Bush’s schedule might stay clear for the next two months. But leave it to the Aggies to stay loyal to all things Bush. News outlets in College Station are reporting that Bush will make a commencement speech in December at a Texas A&M…
Aftermath: …And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead at Warehouse Live
Photos by Chris Gray You gotta love a band as unapologetic about taking its sweet time as …And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead. We won’t even talk about how long it took the Austin five-piece to tune its guitars as the modest crowd in Warehouse Live’s…
World’s Saddest Web Page
Ever wanted to buy a 25-foot sailboat? Got $200 on you? It could be yours. Just head to the world’s saddest web page, where a company called U.S. Auctions is getting rid of Ike-damaged boats. Click on a boat, then click through to the auction page, and you’ll find boats…
Fen-Phen Side Effects: Irritable Lawyers
Remember Fen-phen, the obesity wonder drug that made headlines in the late 1990s when the FDA took it off the market because of abnormal heart problems in users? That same drug also sent product-liability lawyers across the country scrambling to courthouses, taking enough settlement money to pay for Ivy League…
Galveston’s O’Connell High May Close
O’Connell College Prep, the only Catholic high school in Galveston, is in danger of closing (again). Earlier, it was just the general crunch hitting many Catholic schools. This time, it’s Hurricane Ike. Principal Patrick Danesi told parents last night that the school is “in a state of trouble.” They’re taking…
One Way To Get Rid Of Those Campaign Signs
Via Swamplot comes an excellent suggestion for what to do with all those moot campaign signs: Give them to a San Antonio bird shelter. Last Chance Forever is actively seeking signs the thick, plastic-y signs made of Corex or Coroplast. “We’d love to have those old signs for dozens of…
Astros Sign New Closer
Well, someone just told me the Astros signed a free-agent pitcher named Lo. Which had me really excited because I thought he meant free agent pitcher Derek Lowe, who would make a lot of sense for the Astros. Then I was told no, that it wasn’t Derek Lowe, but J-Lo…
Astros Sign New Closer
Well, someone just told me the Astros signed a free-agent pitcher named Lo. Which had me really excited because I thought he meant free agent pitcher Derek Lowe, who would make a lot of sense for the Astros. Then I was told no, that it wasn’t Derek Lowe, but J-Lo…
More Ike-Debris Stats For Your Amazement
Speaking of Ike debris, some more figures are dribbling in from various sources about the clean-up effort. Here’s one accounting, from Sci-Tech Today: In Galveston, workers collected 592,000 pounds of hazardous household waste such as medications and bleach; 28,000 refrigerators, ranges and freezers; 3,000 televisions and computer screens; and 13,000…
Aftermath: Randy Weeks at Discovery Green
Photos by Chris Gray What happened to all the hearty, stiff-upper-lip individuals who survived Hurricane Ike and two weeks without electricity? Two drops of rain falling on downtown seems to have killed the crowd at the weekly Discovery Green show Thursday, keeping attendance somewhere in the 40s, about one-third the…
Tailgating: Breakfast Beer
Students of Texas beer culture might assume that the Texans fans who show up three or four hours before the game to tailgate would prefer Bud Light to craft beers and imports. And while it is undeniably true that a hell of a lot of Bud, Miller and other mainstream…
Kemah’s Boardwalk Slowly Coming To Life
A little less than two months after Hurricane Ike hit, the Kemah Boardwalk is coming to life again. Joe’s Crab Shack reopened Wednesday, and either later today or early tomorrow the Cadillac Bar and several midway games will be ready to go. Tim Anderson, the general manager for the Boardwalk,…
Things We Don’t Get: Walton & Johnson
Through no fault of our own, we stumbled once again on the Walton & Johnson radio show on 950 AM this morning. OK, it was our “fault,” because we were trying to find something interesting to listen to. We had forgotten just how bad these guys are. We quickly remembered…
Five Spot: Baracking Your Balls Off
Welcome back to Five Spot. Every Friday, we’ll examine a recent bit of music news and list five reasons why it’s either brilliant or dumb-assed. Send tips to introducingliston@gmail.com. Word to your moms, Barack came to drop bombs, suckas. He’s President (-elect) and it’s brilliant. Can you believe that shit…
Not So Great News from the Health Department, Downtown Edition
We take a look at downtown restaurants today. Let’s start off with the biggest offender first. Popeye’s (1116 Travis) was inspected on Oct. 15 and they had a whopping 13 violations – way to go Popeye’s! • Food was found that was not safe for human consumption • Potentially hazardous…
Formosa Plant Keeps On Polluting
The pollution record of a Taiwanese company’s largest polyvinyl chloride plant in the U.S. just got worse. The Formosa Plastics Corp. facility in Point Comfort, Texas, yesterday was fined $121,443 by state regulators for numerous air violations and unauthorized emissions in 2005 and 2006. It’s the latest chapter in a…
UH Reporters Won’t Have To Hand Over E-Mails After All
Student reporters for University of Houston’s Daily Cougar won’t have to turn over their e-mail correspondences with staff members. Last week, the paper was sent a request for the documents under the Texas Public Information Act, but UH’s Assistant General Counsel, Eric D. Bentley, fired back with an act of…
Tonight: Deerhoof at Numbers
“Offend Maggie” One more pin in the back of the “all the cool bands skip Houston” hater voodoo doll: because this week hasn’t been weird enough already (though in a very, very good way) all-over-the-map San Francisco oddballs Deerhoof drop by Numbers tonight, proffering tunes from the quartet’s new Kill…
Hispanics Are Almost Never Arrested For Drugs, HPD Somehow Says
At a drug policy summit last week at the Baker Institute, Houston Police Chief Harold Hurtt unveiled some arrests stats that have us here at Hair Balls scratching our heads a bit. The figures had to do with the ethnic and racial breakdown of those arrested for narcotics violations in…
This Just In: The National at Rice University Tomorrow
Rocks Off has learned, via the Hands Up Houston message board, that folk-tinged Brooklyn-via-Cincinnati rockers the National, who knocked Indie Nation’s collective socks off last year on the breathtaking Boxer (“Fake Empire,” “Start a War,” “Ada,” etc.), is the featured entertainment at tomorrow’s All-Rice Picnic, the kickoff to Rice University’s…
Aftermath: Legendary Pink Dots at Warehouse Live
Photos by Jef With One F It’s always amazing and refreshing to see an audience as fervent for its minstrels as Houston is for the Legendary Pink Dots. There are no hangers-back – as soon as the band quietly makes its way onto the stage, there is a Jonestown-like lemming…
If You’ve Ever Heard Of Antonio Sabato, Jr., This News Is For You
We have to admit we know little about Antonio Sabato, Jr. beyond the fact that we’re pretty sure his dad is named Antonio Sabato, Sr. But according to this announcement from Reality Wanted, a website that casts reality-show contestants, Sabato is “one of the worlds most sensual, exotic and sexy…
Bush: The Memoir
Bad news for all of George W. Bush’s fans in his sometime hometown of Houston: No one wants to publish his memoirs. Apparently, incredibly fucking up a country is not the path to literary success. Publishing-industry executives say it would perhaps be best if Bush was to wait a while…
Eyeballin’: Willie Nelson & Wynton Marsalis’ Live from Jazz at Lincoln Center New York City
Associated Press Willie Nelson has had some odd musical partners over the years: Snoop Dogg, Gonzo the Muppet, Julio Iglesias. But the Red Headed Stranger’s live-recorded CD collaboration with Wynton Marsalis, Two Men with the Blues, and now this unwieldy-titled concert DVD, is not only seamless, it’s as if the…
HISD No Longer Looking To Kill All Busing To Magnets
Some HISD parents have been worrying about whether their kids will still be able to get transportation to magnet schools. The high price of gas and the district’s strained budget has led to talk about eliminating busing to magnets. Superintendent Abe Saavedra presented a series of magnet-busing proposals to the…
What History Tells Us: Five Black Presidents
And although it seems heaven sent We ain’t ready, to see a black President 2Pac never lived to see himself proven wrong, but we do have an African-American Commander-in-Chief. The media will be going on for months about the historic nature of this election, the ramifications for America’s future, and…
Tonight: Randy Weeks at Discovery Green
“Motor City” At least until his new, Will Sexton-produced album drops in January, there’s probably no album I return to over and over to like Randy Weeks’ Sugarfinger. From the ominous first track “Looking for a Good Time” through the brilliant cover of Ella Fitzgerald’s “I’d Rather Go Blind” -…
Texas Tailgating 2008
Tailgating used to be a diversion, now it’s the main event. “I gave my tickets to a couple of kids,” the head of the “Whatcha Know Bout Dem Texans??” tailgating team told me in the Reliant Parking lot on a recent Sunday morning. “It’s more fun to hang out in…
Election 2008: Winners and Losers
What’s that sound? Dust settling? No….Dust doesn’t really make any sound as it settles. Nevertheless, dust is settling, dammit, after Election 08, and it’s time to pick the local winners and losers. We’re here to help. Winners 1. Bill White. Everyone wanted to be Mayor Bill White’s best buddy this…
A Dream Team for Barack Obama
President-elect Barack Obama, I would like to congratulate you on your landslide victory Tuesday night. It is truly inspiring. That said, I hope you have had a good rest, because now it’s time for you to get to work. It’s time for you to start picking your Cabinet and lining…
A Dream Team for Barack Obama
President-elect Barack Obama, I would like to congratulate you on your landslide victory Tuesday night. It is truly inspiring. That said, I hope you have had a good rest, because now it’s time for you to get to work. It’s time for you to start picking your Cabinet and lining…
High School Photo Contest: Faces
Our high school photo contest has now entered its sophomore year, and we’ve got some photos to share. Last month’s theme was Faces, and as you can see, we got a lot of mugs. Our next theme is Recovery, whether from Ike, from an accident, from an addiction, from a…
Zack and Miri BEEEEEEEEEEP
Isn’t it odd that the new Kevin Smith film, Zack and Miri Make a Porno, is being marketed as simply Zack and Miri when the advertisements run on certain channels and at certain times? For example, if you’re watching Comedy Central at 10 pm, it’s Zack and Miri Make a…
The Houston Rockets: Goodness Greatness
Prior to Tuesday night’s game against the Celtics, the Rockets’ 3-0 start had many fans filled with what Alan Greenspan might call “irrational exuberance.” So after four games, what do we really know about the ‘08-‘09 Rockets? The preliminary analysis for me says that they are a very good team…
The Houston Rockets: Goodness Greatness
Prior to Tuesday night’s game against the Celtics, the Rockets’ 3-0 start had many fans filled with what Alan Greenspan might call “irrational exuberance.” So after four games, what do we really know about the ‘08-‘09 Rockets? The preliminary analysis for me says that they are a very good team…
The Receptionist
Find out what happens when good people agree to do bad things in Adam Bock’s The Receptionist. Making its regional premiere, the play follows Beverly, a seemingly ordinary office worker who spends her days answering the phone, gossiping with co-workers and trying to find new ways to look busy while…
Les Grands Ballets Canadiens de Montréal
Les Grands Ballets Canadiens de Montréal returns with a wedding and a circus. The internationally acclaimed dance company makes its third trip to Houston for two Bayou City premieres. Didy Veldman’s TooT is an acrobatic, three-ring romp to Shostakovich’s Jazz Suite No. 2. Donning circus-inspired apparel, the dancers bound and…
First Thursdays at Dean’s: Dramatic Shorts
Headlining today’s First Thursdays at Dean’s is Lance Larson’s award-winning Bloom. The suspenseful love story captured — among many others — Best Short at the Hollyshorts Film Festival and Best USA Short at the Jacksonville Film Festival. In it, a used-car lot bookkeeper falls for a scrappy, good-looking guard. When…
Dazed and Confused
When Dazed and Confused hit theaters in 1993, no one knew what kind of legs it would have. The coming-of-age high school comedy starred the still-unfamous Ben Affleck and Matthew McConaughey in all their cheeky best. It would eventually become a cult classic (due, in part, to fans wanting to…
Beatrice and Benedict
Sometimes we need a little trickery to let ourselves fall in love, especially if our names are Beatrice and Benedict, the silly singles at the center of Shakespeare’s charming comedy Much Ado about Nothing. Hector Berlioz translated the tale into an opera titled Beatrice and Benedict in the 1800s, infusing…
Two Faces of Donizetti
Gaetano Donizetti lovers are in for a treat when Opera in the Heights presents two very different scores from the great Italian composer with Two Faces of Donizetti. Opening the evening is the first act of the tragedy Lucia di Lammermoor, performed in concert style. Based on a Sir Walter…
Buckethead
Buckethead. You know the story: Kick-ass guitar player wears KFC bucket on head, mask on face, used to play with Guns N’ Roses. (Personally, he reminds us of Stevie Ray, risen from the dead to rain down his ridiculous riffage for all eternity. But it’s a dude named Brian Carroll.)…
“In the Garden of Nymph Ancolie”
In 1934 Max Ernst covered a wall in a Zurich nightclub with gorgeous yellow and red petal images out of which rises a bright blue bird-like image. The surreal mural by one of the century’s most significant artists is playful, charming and gorgeous. And it’s the only existing fully intact…
Secret Saturday Show One Year Anniversary
Want to know who is playing the Secret Saturday Show One Year Anniversary? We do, too. But part of the charm of this weekly showcase of local bands is its organizer’s ability to keep the cat in the bag. (And it’s also what helped it win Best Concert Series in…
Gulf Coast Reading Series: Samuel Amadon, Lauren Berry and Dane Wisher
Gulf Coast Reading Series poet Samuel Amadon is well versed in television. (Get it: versed, poet? Never mind.) His piece “Spy Poem” combines his passions for both prime time and the written word. “[I’m] trying to somehow put together my love of terrible TV drama shows and poetry,” he says…
Fic at NiteBoomsday
Imagine a world where the economy is in total meltdown…oh, wait, we don’t have to imagine. The world’s economy is in total meltdown! Well, then imagine politicians who are so desperate to balance the books, they’re offering senior citizens a tax break if they commit suicide. Novelist Christopher Buckley did…
Philip Durbin: “A Coarse Portal”
“A Coarse Portal” showcases local artist Philip Durbin’s most vivid work yet. “It’s going to be really bright, that’s for sure,” he says. “I used to just draw in black and white, and in the past couple years I found color and have been trying to blow it up —…
The Art Guys Silver Jubilee Tribute Album Concert and Variety Show Extravaganza
The Art Guys are such an ingrained part of Houston that their illuminated suitcases are the first thing to greet international visitors in the airport’s baggage claim area. Sometimes silly, sometimes serious, but always at the forefront of the local scene, the performance/visual-art duo have been together since 1983, a…
Secret Order Talkback
During today’s Secret Order Talkback, the cast and members of the Alley’s artistic staff return to the stage following the evening’s performance. They’ll discuss Bob Clyman’s tale of a young scientist who has found a possible cure for cancer and the politically charged reaction of his colleagues and competitors, giving…
“Gelam Nguzu Kazi—Dugong My Son”
You can’t get much farther from Houston than Australia, and you can’t get much farther from the usual local art fare than with “Gelam Nguzu Kazi — Dugong My Son,” an exhibition at the Museum of Printing History. Presented in conjunction with the local Australian consulate, the show features 33…
My Guitar Hero Gently Weeps
The Guitar Hero series has finally hit a sour note. The fake rock rampart — which started out as a goofy way to live vicariously through Jimi Hendrix and ended up being the most improbable cultural phenomenon since the spawn of Billy Ray Cyrus — has been comfortably picking and…
The Nines
John August is famous for his quirky and lovingly oddball scripts, including The Corpse Bride and Big Fish. In 2007 he made his directorial debut with The Nines, which screened at the Sundance Film Festival that year. The strange story starts off with a troubled actor named Gary (played by…
Santiago
Documentarian João Moreira Salles is at odds with himself in Santiago, today’s installment of the Celebrating Brazilian Film Now and Then series. The film, an intimate and unblinking look at Roteiro Santiago, the Salles family butler of 30 years, not only reveals Santiago’s own story, but also Salles’s bourgeois guilt…
Michael A. Salter: “too much”
Artist Michael Salter uses thousands of pieces of Styrofoam to make Styrobots, his huge, machinery-laden robot creatures that look straight out of Star Wars. “too much” Salter’s solo installation at Rice Gallery, features the latest in a series of Styrobots. Each creation is unique, using mixed-and-matched foam bits to make…
No End in Sight
The scathing documentary No End in Sight raises some ugly questions about the Iraq war. Who’s responsible for the debacle? Who knew what and when? Why was our own intel ignored? According to pivotal players such as Ambassador Barbara Bodine and Deputy Secretary of State Richard Armitage, their attempts to…
Totally Teens Book Club: Breaking Dawn
There’s been plenty of buzz about Stephenie Meyer’s vampire love story, the Twilight series, chronicling the doomed love between Bella (a human) and Edward (a vampire). The final installment, Breaking Dawn, was released last August to much hoopla (think midnight release parties and crushes of teen readers fighting for the…
“Vision Eclipsed”
The British-born Lucinda Cobley is a painter, but instead of using traditional stretched canvas, she brushes her paint, oil and pigments onto etched or sand-blasted glass. The result? Ultratranslucent colors that are responsive to light, making each stroke and layer especially multifaceted. “Vision Eclipsed,” her current exhibition at Wade Wilson…
Chasing Tornadoes
You might think that after Hurricane Ike, Houstonians would want to avoid hearing about swirling vortices of wind, but it’s hard to resist a lecture from tornado expert Tim Samaras, who will present Chasing Tornadoes tonight at the Houston Museum of Natural Science. Using footage from his many close encounters,…
Texas Renaissance Festival
Don’t be surprised if recently, when passing through the general area of Magnolia, you heard swords clashing, horses whinnying and a chorus of “Hear Ye’s.” It’s just the ongoing Texas Renaissance Festival, which has been storming the Houston area since 1974, bringing with it magic, merriment, fireworks and faux jousting…
“First Americans”
“First Americans” refers to the arrows, not the Indians. The exhibit showcases artifacts such as weapons (like arrowheads), tools, pottery and more. These objects could support the theory that the first visitors to our continent didn’t come across the Bering Land Bridge from Asia but instead may have traveled via…
7th Annual Houston Area Arcade Expo
For joystick jockeys who find endless Metal Gear Solid 4 cut scenes about as stimulating as watching Howards End on Xanax, don’t fret — old-school salvation has arrived in the form of the 7th Annual Houston Area Arcade Expo. The event brings more than 80 arcade games and pinball machines…
Doctor Atomic
Think these are nerve-wracking times? It might help to remember that this high anxiety moment in history is just one more link in a long chain of such moments. There’s no better reminder of this nail–biting fact than John Adams’s mesmerizing contemporary opera Doctor Atomic. The story follows J. Robert…
“Talk Is Cheap”
In this time of endless blubbering by pundits and politicians, it’s very clear that talk is cheap. But not everyone wants to add to the din, so a group of local urban artists decided they would shut up and paint, letting their art do their talking for them. The result…
“Viewfinder: New Images from Texas Artists”
Take a break from the current political frenzy and check out “Viewfinder: New Images from Texas Artists,” a photography exhibition at FotoFest that displays the creative diversity of this big state. Part of the Talent in Texas exhibition series, the program brings together photo-related work from some dozen artists, most…
Sleuth
Payback is a bitch — just ask the twisted characters of Sleuth, currently in production at Theater Southwest. When a beautiful woman’s older husband and younger lover meet, the two men play a deadly game of one-upmanship. Filled with threats and psychological intimidation masked by sophisticated, witty repartee, Sleuth takes…
Disney on Ice-Disneyland Adventure
Disney on Ice-Disneyland Adventure is packed with more fun than you can shake an icicle at. Mickey Mouse and the gang take fans on a wintry romp through the sights and sounds of Disney’s theme parks and movies. Snow White and Cinderella make a cameo at the Main Street Parade,…
The Strangerer
Catastrophic Theatre’s The Strangerer takes us back to 2004 and the first Bush/Kerry presidential debate. True to form, the issues being talked about have life-and-death consequences — in this case, for moderator Jim Lehrer. Bush and Kerry aren’t debating economics or immigration, not even the war. No, the two men…
Kathy Griffin
Kathy Griffin wants to start out our interview with a word of thanks and praise (for herself, of course). “I really have been starting my shows with just thanking the audience for buying a ticket in this economy. It’s a big deal,” she says and then adds, “and it’s not…
Vagabond Cirque
L’imprevu Bellydance’s Vagabond Cirque is for the kid in you…well, at least the kid who wanted to watch the “dirty parts” of all the R-rated movies. Avant Garden will be transformed into an adults-only, 1920s-vaudeville-style circus with naughty-fied belly dancing, burlesque, fire breathers, nude drawing, fortune telling and magic shows…
“A One-Man Army: The Art of Arthur Szyk”
As millions of fellow Jews in his homeland of Poland were being sent to the death camps, Arthur Szyk fought fascism from afar the best way he knew how: through his art. The Polish-born Szyk (pronounced “shik”) emigrated to the United States in 1940 and began producing political propaganda for…
Sheryl Underwood
If you don’t want to hear Sheryl Underwood’s opinions on sex, relationships, politics and life, she doesn’t care. She’s going to bring it on anyway. Underwood, who calls herself a “sexually progressive, God-fearing, black conservative Republican” — whatever that means — has the uncanny ability to make the audience understand…
The Mystery of Irma Vep
Think Tuna Goes to Transylvania, and you’ll get an idea of what the satirical comedy The Mystery of Irma Vep is all about. Taking a poke at Victorian melodramas and theatrical farce, and spoofing films such as Alfred Hitchcock’s classic Rebecca, the wickedly funny Irma Vep features two actors, eight…
36th Annual Jewish Book and Arts Fair
Today’s authors at the 36th Annual Jewish Book and Arts Fair include Ariel Sabar, who reads from his book My Father’s Paradise: A Son’s Search for his Jewish Past in Kurdish Iraq. The book traces the history of Sabar’s family, recounting the story of Sabar’s father, who was born in…
Inprint Brown Reading Series: Natasha Trethewey and John Edgar Wideman
Today’s Inprint Brown Reading Series writers, poet Natasha Trethewey and novelist John Edgar Wideman, have different approaches to the African-American experience. Trethewey, who grew up in Mississippi as the daughter of a white man and a black woman, won the 2007 Pulitzer Prize for Native Guard, a collection of poetry…
“Perspectives 163: Every Sound You Can Imagine” Gallery Talk
Hear what Suzanne Bloom, an exhibiting artist and professor at the University of Houston, has to say at today’s “Perspectives 163: Every Sound You Can Imagine” talk. Exploring experimental music scores from the 1950s to 1990s as art, “Perspectives 163” takes the scores and turns them into canvases. 6:30 p.m…
Z-Ro: Crack
By and large, humans are communal creatures; Z-Ro, however, is not fortunate enough to be a “by and large” type of guy, and his awareness of this is precisely what has made him such a fervent and authentic spokesman of scrape. He’s preached a gospel of distrust and cynicism for…
Annuals, Minus the Bear
Annuals are at the forefront of indie-rock’s New Density movement. Comparable to contemporaries Gang Gang Dance, Islands and Yeasayer, the ADD-affected North Carolina sextet is a jubilant centrifuge of influences, compacting aspects of stadium rock, tropicalia and even country into a unique brand of cross-pollinated pop, complete with elaborate string…
Canadian Questions
Dear Readers, So your presidential candidate lost (congratulations; McBama! Our condolences, O’Cain. Damn early deadlines…), and you can’t bear the thought of living under his reign for the next cuatro years. Fear not: The other side of America’s bullshit sandwich will save you! The Mexican hereby turns this column over…
Big Daddies in Role Models
Paul Rudd wears the constant look of glazed-eye amusement; everything seems to tickle him, even that which annoys or frustrates or disappoints him. He’s frat-boy handsome and therefore almost anonymous when he stands in a movie-star lineup; in Neil LaBute’s The Shape of Things (2003), Rudd received a supposedly extreme…
Sex on Wheels
Avant-garde artists, musicians in particular, have struggled to strike a balance between genius and pretentiousness for decades. From Lou Reed’s infamous noise exploration Metal Machine Music to the Flaming Lips’ Zaireeka, which required listeners to simultaneously play four separate CDs in four separate stereos, art-rockers have always braved a backlash…
Art Imitates Life Imitating Art in Charlie Kaufman’s Synecdoche, New York
If you traveled the length of John Malkovich’s medulla oblongata, hung a sharp left at the desk where Beckett’s Krapp recorded his last tape, and walked through the adjoining door of the interstellar hotel room at the end of 2001, you might end up somewhere in the vicinity of Charlie…
Fund-raiser Blues
Every day seems to bring more bad news. “Consumer Spending Tumbles,” blared last Friday’s Houston Chronicle, two days after the Federal Reserve lowered the benchmark interest rate — again. A subsequent Google News search for “economic crisis” yielded more than 1,200 hits from the local daily alone. Bob Dylan pegged…
Lucinda Williams: Little Honey
“Throw a wide loop,” my dad used to say, and Lucinda Williams has certainly thrown her widest musical loop yet with Little Honey. After 2006’s dull, disappointing West, Williams sounds like a woman with her groove back, mixing blazing steroidal rockers like riveting opener “Real Love” with trademark sultry love…
…And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead
The body count keeps rising for …And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead. The Austin-via-Olympia noise-rockers scored one of the decade’s best albums with 2002’s ferocious, forbidding Source Tags and Codes, the beginning of a bittersweet tenure on Interscope Records that ended after the band’s most recent…
Cro-Mags (jam)
NYC’s Cro-Mags are usually credited as one of the first bands to have played hardcore punk with heavy-metal influences, helping to create the fusion variously referred to as “hardcore metal,” “metalcore” and “crossover thrash,” and which helped lay the groundwork for all sorts of oddly named sub-sub-subgenres of hard rock,…
The Right Footage in “Remixed & Reloaded”
If you want to see all the work in “Remixed & Reloaded: Black Women Artists and the Moving Image Since 1970” at the Contemporary Arts Museum Houston, you’d better pack a lunch. With almost 50 video works in the show, projected in separate rooms or presented on monitors, there are…
Hickoids
The Hickoids are to country music what a stick of dynamite is to firecrackers. Back in the days when no one had to worry much about keeping Austin weird, the Hickoids were doing their best to make it the weirdest place in Texas, if not on earth. Winners of Best…
Capsule Art Reviews: “A Coarse Portal,” “Damaged Romanticism,” “The Dead Weight of a Quarrel Hangs” “Incident at Osbourne Grove,” “Juan Andres Videla: The Unsaid Word,” “Liz Ward: Crazy Weather,” “Machines, Buildings and Books”
“A Coarse Portal” “A Coarse Portal” is Philip Durbin’s largest showing to date, and it’s a fine rogue’s gallery of the characters that inhabit Durbin’s dreamy kingdom. The artist is obviously influenced by pop art and Warhol in particular — as seen in silk screens like Pop Skulls and OJ…
Jad Fair
As a founding member of oddball noise rockers Half Japanese, Jad Fair made a living off of his quirky music. His solo efforts over the years have mostly been more restrained affairs, however, and recent collaborations with sometimes better-known musicians (Daniel Johnston, Richard Hell, Yo La Tengo, Teenage Fanclub) have…
Donor Babies Search for Their Anonymous Fathers
On the morning of May 4, 1981, Nancy LaBounty was ready to conceive a child. She went to the Baylor College of Medicine infertility clinic, located in what is now St. Luke’s Episcopal Hospital, and rode the elevator to the 22nd floor. As she waited in the clinic lobby, a…
Bayousphere
“What do you think you’re looking at? Oh — probably this enormous fishhook in my back. That’s understandable, then.” Numbers was the scene for Noche de Brujas, Noche de Torturas recently, which was a night of witches, torture, an erotic fashion show and whatever this guy thinks he’s doing. To…
Sugar Shack, Teisco Del Rey, Neptones, etc.
This is the story of Johnny Romano, a Galveston surfing prodigy who succumbed to leukemia September 23, days after his family lost its home to Hurricane Ike. He was ten years old. Romano was a regular in the island’s “grom” — surf-speak for tykes — competitions, where his board skills…
ISLA COQUI’S EL CHUPACABRA JR.
So the first reported sightings of El Chupacabra, the legendary goat-sucker, apparently occurred in Puerto Rico. Maybe that’s why a cocktail called El Chupacabra Jr. appears on the menu at Puerto Rican joint Isla Coqui’s Restaurant & Bar (1801 Durham Dr. #1A, 713-861-1000). According to some guy, the “real” Chupacabra sucks…
Rodney Crowell, Forever the Houston Kid
Songwriter supreme Rodney Crowell, whose latest LP Sex & Gasoline (Lost Highway) came out last month, will publish a memoir in early 2010 that deals with his Houston years “but not my music career.” Though a longtime Nashville resident, Crowell’s open love affair with his hometown, which culminated on 2001’s…
Science Fiction in Secret Order
A researcher and his lab hardly seem like the stuff of edge-of-your-seat theater, but that’s exactly what Bob Clyman creates in Secret Order, now running at the Alley Theatre. The tale of lab coats and deceit takes us into the high-stakes world of cancer research, where money, publishing and power…
Capsule Stage Reviews: …and L.A. Is Burning, Beatrice and Benedict, The Strangerer
…and L.A. Is Burning In 1992, the whole country raged after the officers accused of (and video-taped) beating Rodney King were acquitted of the crime. In L.A., there was rioting in the streets; in the rest of the country, there was outrage and shock. Y York’s …and L.A. Is Burning,…
Bronx Cheer
With regard to masculinity, a beard is the penultimate facial accessory. Less hipster-clichéd than a mustache, more intentional than a scar, it’s, we suspect, the sole reason 28-year-old Matthew Swulius has been allowed into Rice Village’s Bronx Bar (5555 Morningside). In lieu of the compulsory description of Swulius’s attire, we’ll only…
Donor Babies: Are You My Mother?
Men, of course, aren’t the only donors out there. In recent years, egg donation has become more common. Just ask Ginger Green at the Houston Fertility Institute. When the clinic opened six years ago, Green says, it assisted between ten and 20 women looking to conceive via egg donation. In 2007,…
Parts & Labor: Receivers
Dan Friel and B.J. Warshaw of Brooklyn’s Parts & Labor are known for wearing their punk influences on their sleeves, but both 2006’s Stay Afraid and last year’s Mapmaker contained elements that suggested the band was outgrowing its hardcore-rooted noise-rock. With Receivers, the diffusion and redirection of those influences has…
Soul Men Pays Fitting Tribute to the Late Bernie Mac
If the dream of every comic is to have his humor live on long after he’s left the stage, then the late Bernie Mac has exited this world on a high note. Soul Men, a comedy completed shortly before Mac’s untimely death in August, is no classic, but the comedian,…
Busy Beaver’s
The fork-tender pork carnitas at Beaver’s came on a slice of Texas toast that floated on a pool of savory greens surrounded by bacon and bean ragout and guajillo chile sauce. Wisps of fried onion garnished the homey masterpiece. Beaver’s new chef, Jonathan Jones, calls this kind of combo plate…
Still Catching the Wave with A Girl Cut in Two
From the standpoint of 2008, the French new wave that broke half a century ago is a towering monument to a particular moment — a solitary whitecap in a Courbet seascape. What was that surge? As a film critic or a filmmaker (or, in most cases, both), each of the…
Textile in the Heights
The long-awaited debut of Scott Tycer’s Textile (611 W. 22nd St., 832-209-7174) is finally upon us. Tycer, of course, brought Houston Aries, which morphed into Pic before going away completely, as well as the ever-popular Kraftsmen Baking and Gravitas. His latest venture is housed in a building that dates from 1894…
Hurricane Rachael Ray
They survived Hurricane Ike. Now they’ll have to survive Rachael Ray. Fifty Houston couples whose wedding plans were disrupted by Ike will now have a very special wedding thanks to Ray, who in our limited knowledge of such things seems to be a Martha Stewart knockoff. By “very special wedding,”…
Mesmerizing Mocha at Ibiza Food and Wine Bar
If you don’t pay close attention to this dessert’s name — mocha espresso bread pudding — at Ibiza Food and Wine Bar (2450 Louisiana, 713-524-0004), you’re going to be sure the waiter made a mistake when he brings it to your table. Instead of the usual light beige color, this…
Foul Ball and Quick Fix
Hot garbage: The published full-page ad for the Sports Monkey/Lucky’s Pub’s “12th Annual Pimp-n-Prostitute Ball”…sigh [page 51, October 23 paper]. This ad is hot garbage! Why is it in my Houston Press? I understand that ad sales finance the Houston Press…but are times this bad? If you look at the…
Oasis: Dig Out Your Soul
Here’s a dirty little critical secret: Many times when reviewers describe an album as being a veteran band’s best since “fill in the blank,” they remember zilch about the discs that appeared in between. That’s certainly the case when it comes to Oasis, which has been stylistically consistent to the…
