50 Shades of Grey fans, are you happy now? It was announced this week that the role of Monsieur Grey, which was to be portrayed by Sons of Anarchy actor Charlie Hunnam, is once again left unfilled. According to all over the place, Hunnam dropped out of the film due to scheduling conflicts. He is very busy riding motorcycles and running guns; however, that did not dissuade him from starring in this year's action-adventure film, Pacific Rim. The other swirl of rumors on the Interwebs is that Hunnam doesn't like being in the spotlight (hmm... he's an actor) and/or all the attention from 50 Shades fans freaked him out. If you recall, when his casting in the role was first announced, fans were none too pleased.
Personally, I like Hunnam, and let's not pretend that he isn't gorgeous. I read the first 50 Shades book, -- this was all I could stomach from the series -- and while I have no idea why people think so highly of it or how its utter lack of plot and complete abuse of the words "oh my..." can even be turned into a film, I will play ball. Hunnam was probably not the right actor for the role. Christian Grey is dark, brooding and mysterious and Hunnam is light and pretty. If anyone should play Grey it should be that kid in high school that we all had a crush on because he wore black nail polish before it was cool and listened to The Smiths and cried. But he is probably very fat now or bald.
So who should play Mr. Grey? There have been several actors now rumored to take on the part. I've heard Jamie Dornan of Once Upon a Time, Matt Bomer of White Collar, Alexander Skarsgard of True Blood, and then of course Rob Pattinson, whom has allegedly said no repeatedly. It's no surprise that Pattinson is a fan favorite and the first choice of author E.L. James because didn't 50 Shades start out as bad Twilight fan-fiction? (That somehow sounds like an oxymoron, but I don't know how.)
I know that we've all played this game before and if you are a fan you have your first choice, but I for one am curious as to who people really think should portray the sexually domineering, "50 shades of effed up," incredibly rich but "oh, it's so lonely at the top," slightly sociopathic, but I do come from a rather normal and loving family so it really doesn't make sense in terms of character development, can have any woman but somehow finds homely awkward girls significantly younger than him attractive, Christian Grey.
Rather than going for the obvious - here are a few of my ideas.
Bill Murray
Sexy? Totally. Peculiar? More than most. Incredible actor? Oh my. Murray would be an odd choice, solely based on his age, but wouldn't he make the movie that much better? It is also rumored that there are some issues with the script (not surprisingly); just let Murray come in and ad-lib the whole thing like he did with Lost in Translation and whoever winds up taking screenwriting credit will probably be nominated for an Oscar. Idris Elba
Who says Christian Grey can't be black? Not I. And of the black actors out there Elba is one who you might let smack you on the bum he is British so he calls it a bum) and it would seem kinda hot. Grey is just a less interesting version of Stringer Bell anyway.
Robert Downey Jr. Christian Grey would love having a woman literally rip out his heart. Why not RDJ? That guy has taken on just about every role there is to tackle during his career, and you can't say that he is not an expert at playing self-centered, eccentric rich genius? It's called Iron Man.
Joaquin Phoenix
For the record, Joaquin Phoneix is not my steeze, but lots of ladies enjoy him. He's been looking a bit broken down as of late. No matter, that dude is so method he can take on any part you throw his way with gusto. I imagine that if he was given the role of Christian Grey he would beef up, change his hair, become experienced at piloting small planes, create his own room of sadomasochistic toys and then he would make a documentary about prepping for the part. Let's try this; this could work like gangbusters. A total unknown
Why are the producers trying to fit an already established actor into this part? Why not do an American Idol-style search for the new Christian Grey? And then, hello Hollywood, let's make a reality show out of it! Finding Christian Grey. There are thousands and thousands of beautiful men in this world, why shouldn't they all get a shot at this senselessly iconic role? Text to vote in your choice of Christian Grey and you could win a walk on whipping in the movie. The challenges will involve lip biting, butt-smacking, looking coy, acting aloof, steeping Earl Grey tea, exercising profusely, snarky emailing, buying stuff for people who don't want it and singing Aerosmith, just because.
NBC, seriously, get on this. You have nothing else.
