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Top Five: Micro-Shows

The average person watches about 4 hours of television each day, and there are plenty of hour-long dramas for continual consumption on every channel. For some people, missing those shows would definitely take a toll on their mental stability. Did House eat the Vicodin? Which doctor will the new intern bone in the medical supply closet?

But some people have managed to free their minds from oppressive hour long dramas How did they do it? 15 minute shows. That's right, for just 1/4th of the time, you can be entertained, fulfilled, and carry on with your day. Which mini-shows to watch? Streamline your life with our top five.

5. Delocated This show about a reality show concerns "Jon," an unfortunately goofy guy in the witness protection program. Currently in its second season, delocated has joined the big leagues of 30-minute time slots, but we're counting it anyway, because it's hilarious. Watch Jon try and become dog-mayor of New York City, avoid assassination by the Russian mob, and navigate relationship problems with his girlfriend/a plaster mold of his girlfriend's hand. It's worth it!

4. Children's Hospital This wonderful little gem clocks in around 10 minutes. Children's Hospital's sole purpose is to make fun of everything in the history of medical drama. There's lots of supply-closet sex, clowns healing the sick--the poor, handicapped chief of surgery is miraculously healed and blossoms into Eva Longoria. There's no reason to watch any "real" medical show when you can just watch Children's.

3. Metalocalypse A death metal band becomes the third largest economy in the world, kills people, undergoes group therapy, and deals with the pains of starting its own clothing label. (It's not just for metal heads.) Most people can enjoy this overall lighthearted 15-minute foray into awesomeness.

2. Aqua Teen Hunger Force Absurdist, funny, short. Not just for bong rippers and 12 year-olds. This show is a depth free journey to the center of nothing. Hilarious.

1. Check it Out! with Steve Brule John C. Reilly expands his short segment from Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! into a full-fledged pseudo-70's public information segment. Complete with fake static, terrible video quality, and cheesy synths. Check it out, indeed.

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Joe Wozny