Dear Willie D:
I'm 19 years old and I've been stealing things since I was five. I steal so much it's become a hobby. Most of the stuff I steal isn't even worth stealing. I just take it because it's there; like the time I stole a cigarette lighter out of my friend dad's truck as he was taking us to a party. When I visit friends, and relatives at their homes I always find something to steal.
The biggest item I ever stole was a $1,800 bicycle. I stole it in plain sight of the store clerk. I think I get away with stealing mostly because I'm quiet and unassuming. I have a boy-next-door thing going on, and when I wear a polo shirt, or a button down it throws people off. I want to stop stealing, but I don't know how. What is your advice?
Stealing For Fun:
Try getting caught, and beaten within a half-inch of your life. After that, stealing will be the last thing on your mind.
TRYING NEW TRICKS IN BED ON MY BOYFRIEND
Dear Willie D:
I became a fan of your column after reading your one-year anniversary Valentine's Day edition and was hoping you could assist me with my little problem. Last night as I was making love with my boyfriend the most amazing feeling rushed through my body as I thought about your advice to "assume the position" that I saw in an erotic book. The position requires the woman to lie on her neck with each of her legs on her guy's shoulders as he stands over her thrusting into her in a squatting position.
I didn't go through with it because I was thinking that my boyfriend might freak out and think I was a slut or something. Our sex life is good, but I think it could be much better if we try new positions, and switched things up from time to time. How do you suggest I pull him in to get with the program?
New Tricks:
I'm on your side. Sex, like life in general, is much more interesting and fun when you switch things up. You could take over and tease him by presenting to him the position you want to be taken in. Guys like it when a woman acts freaky.
But if you think he might freak out, talk to him about it first. A good time to bring it up would be right after making love. Men can't think straight after sex. The sense of peace and relaxation we get after ejaculation scrambles our brain cells, and causes us to agree to anything a woman asks of us. Put it on him good enough and you could get him to agree that the next time you make love he'll have Prince in your bedroom singing "Purple Rain" in a cloud of smoke.
PREVIOUSLY ON ASK WILLIE D
My Friend Is a Real Hothead. Help!
Willie D's 10 Naughty & Romantic Tips for Valentine's Day & Beyond
He Likes Me But I Like His Friend. Help!
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