The Holy War Has Begun, and It Is Being Waged with Giant Crosses
There amid the regiment of high-tension, high-voltage power lines that line the South Beltway, Sagemont Church’s brand-new 170-foot cross does not look as impressive as it might if it were situated in more glorious isolation. (The mountaintop Jesus of Rio Janeiro is 45 feet shorter but much more striking.) Driving…
The Nickel: A Musical History of the Fifth Ward, Part 2
[Note: Part 1 is here, and the Eating Our Words entry that inspired this series is here.] To tell the story of music in the Fifth Ward with anything like the sweep it deserves, we will have to go way back to the 19th century. On a November day in…
Lonesome Onry and Mean: Corb Lund Joins New West Stable
“Roughest Neck Around” Lonesome Onry and Mean has been a Corb Lund fan since about five minutes into his first pass through Lund’s album Five Dollar Bill. I remember watching those guys during the opening hour of SXSW at B.D. Riley’s five years ago with some musician buddies. Like the…
Tonight: Cradle of Filth at House of Blues
Creepy symphonic extreme metal doesn’t get much better than Cradle of Filth. Over the Suffolk, England-spawned band’s nearly 20-year history, lead singer Dani Filth has become the standard by which all of metal’s darker practitioners are measured. The band’s lyrics and imagery are playfully satanic, used more for shock rather…
The Temporary Artwork That Was More Temporary Than Expected
The artwork, called To Whom It May Concern, was never meant to be permanent. After all, the text piece was made of mulch and left out in the elements in the vacant lot next door to Lawndale Art Center. Artist Emily Sloan says that part of the piece was that…
Aftermath: Greg Ginn & the Taylor Texas Corrugators and Jambang at Last Concert Cafe
Even while playing dissonant improvised bass in a trio consisting of himself, a shit-hot mandolin player, and a jazz drummer, Greg Ginn still sounds like Greg Ginn. After almost a decade as the captain of hardcore mavericks Black Flag, Ginn embarked on a career as an improvised musician. During his…
Artist of the Week: Devil Killing Moth
Each Wednesday, Rocks Off arbitrarily appoints one lucky local performer or group “Artist of the Week,” bestowing upon them all the fame and grandeur such a lofty title implies. Know a band or artist that isn’t awful? Email their particulars to introducingliston@gmail.com. You know that super-corny guy in the movies,…
Quanell X Responds to HPD Defamation Suit
Activist Quanell X says he’s not feeling the blues these days, despite the recent defamation lawsuit that three Houston police officers have filed against him. “I’m strong, I’m focused and I feel good,” Quanell tells Hair Balls. Earlier this month, three officers sued Quanell claiming he humiliated and harmed their…
Baseball Player Shot by Police Calls for Bellaire Mayor’s Resignation
Robert Tolan, the minor league baseball player shot by Bellaire cops in his parents’ driveway on December 31, called for Bellaire Mayor Cindy Siegel’s resignation at a press conference today. “I would hope that Bellaire’s residents are appalled and outraged,” Tolan told a crowd of about 100 people who gathered…
Idol Beat: The Final 36, Group 1
Let the dividing and conquering commence! Here’s how it works this year: dude and lass with the highest vote counts in each of the three sub-groups of 12 are in like Flynn, plus the next-highest vote-getter, regardless of gender. Once the “Top 9” are determined, there’ll be some wild-card hoo-ha…
Aftermath: Hank III & Assjack at Meridian
Right now there are about 1,000 people in the Greater Houston area nursing crippling hangovers, and Aftermath is right proud to be among their ranks. Must’ve been the pills I took. No, wait, that’s not it. Pretty sure it was the whiskey. And the beer. And the mainline of pissed-off,…
Viet-Tex-Mex: Fried Avocado Lettuce Wraps
“Fried Avocado Lettuce Wraps” is the name of popular new appetizer on the menu of Matt’s Rancho Martinez in Dallas. Invented by fourth-generation Tex-Mex chef Marco Martinez, the dish features chicken-fried avocado slices served with Vietnamese-style lettuce wraps and condiments along with a monkey bowl of ranch dressing for dipping…
Satellite Collison Might’ve Screwed the Hubble Too
Remember when those two satellites crashed into each other? Really? It was just last week. Anyway, Nature is reporting that the debris caused by the collision could have far-reaching consequences for science missions, in particular for the Hubble telescope (which up to this point has never had any troubles, nope,…
Tracy McGrady Out For the Season; Yes, It’s the Knee Again
For those who haven’t heard the news yet, last night, Tracy McGrady told ESPN screamer/reporter Stephen A. Smith that he will be missing the rest of the season because he is having microfracture surgery on his troublesome left knee. The Rockets are refusing to comment on the story. The Rockets…
Tracy McGrady Out For the Season; Yes, It’s the Knee Again
For those who haven’t heard the news yet, last night, Tracy McGrady told ESPN screamer/reporter Stephen A. Smith that he will be missing the rest of the season because he is having microfracture surgery on his troublesome left knee. The Rockets are refusing to comment on the story. The Rockets…
Is Houston-to-Galveston Rail Actually a Real Possibility?
A couple of weeks ago Hair Balls was on the Island, quaffing a few pints at O’Malley’s Stage Door Pub with several of the Islander By Choice bloggers -members of Galveston’s small but increasingly feisty and vocal thirtysomething-age middle class. “We’re all drooling over rail,” said IBC blogger Adrienne Culpepper…
Memo Re: Slap Shot Remake
TO: President, Universal Pictures FROM: Script Department RE: Slap Shot Remake We received a copy of Peter Steinfeld’s (21) first draft for the planned Slap Shot remake. Before we pass it on to the director currently attached to this project (Dean Parisot, Fun With Dick and Jane), we thought we…
Memo Re: Slap Shot Remake
TO: President, Universal Pictures FROM: Script Department RE: Slap Shot Remake We received a copy of Peter Steinfeld’s (21) first draft for the planned Slap Shot remake. Before we pass it on to the director currently attached to this project (Dean Parisot, Fun With Dick and Jane), we thought we…
Morning! How About Some Playboy Action from the Chron?
Sure, sure, we have absolutely no room to talk, what with this and this (and especially this), but does anyone else think it’s kind of awesome that the Chron has a slideshow on its homepage right now devoted to 55 years of Playboy magazine? Nothing like a little T&A with…
Flavors of the 5th: Davis Meat Co. BBQ
The barbecue at Davis Meat Co. on Lockwood is worthy of your attention. The brisket is tender, juicy and tastes fabulous on a sandwich. And the housemade coarsely-ground pork and beef link is one of the best sausages made within the city limits. Unfortunately, the pork ribs come from oversize…
The Nickel: A Musical History of the Fifth Ward, Part 1
Back in its heyday, the corner of Jensen Drive and Lyons Avenue was known as “Pearl Harbor, the Times Square of the Bloody Fifth.” You wouldn’t know it today – the entire area is a vast wasteland of tired and abandoned lots and boarded-up shacks, but for much of the…
East Texas Teacher Claims Witch-Hunt Because He’s Atheist, Pro-Obama
Brookeland is a town of about 1,800, just north of Jasper. So it’s small enough that when a teacher claims to have been railroaded out of a job because he’s an atheist and an Obama-supporter, it doesn’t take long for the rumors, trash-talk, wild accusations, and just plain weirdness to…
Mike Jones Wants to Get “Next to You”
Who is Mike Jones? Well, not long ago, he was Trae’s punching bag at the Ozone Awards, which at least reminded people he was still alive. Well, Jones has a new single, “Next to You,” from his forthcoming album The Voice (due April 14), and it’s probably not going to enhance his…
Allen Stanford And John Cornyn: Best Buds For Sun-Drenched Road Trips
Who likes to travel with Houston’s newest financial-meltdown icon?Senator John Cornyn, that’s who.Talking Points Memo has the goods, via legistorm.com, on a “fact-finding trip” (quotes federally mandated by the US Department of Air Quotes) that Cornyn took on Allen Stanford’s dime to Antigua and Barbuda right after the 2004 election.”Sen…
Lone Star Saloon In Richmond To Be Demolished, Reborn
The historic Lone Star Saloon in Richmond is about to be demolished.Heavily damaged by a fire in November, the remains of the 120-year-old building will be taken down by the end of the month, owner Bill Lundquist tells Fort Bend Now.The good news: He’s planning to build a replacement. That’s…
Tonight: Greg Ginn & the Taylor Texas Corrugators at Last Concert Cafe
If we were to tell you that one of the most influential guitarists and innovators in the early ’80s hardcore movement was living in the tiny town of Taylor (30 miles outside Austin) you would call us crazy. But that’s where Greg Ginn, founding guitarist of hardcore’s lode-bearing Black Flag…
Mardis Gras Road Trip: Crispy Cajun Chicken
The crunchy batter explodes loudly and your shirt gets showered with crumbs every time you bite into the spectacular fried chicken at Chester’s Place-Cypress Inn on Highway 20 in Donner, Louisiana (no relation to the Chester’s Fried Chicken chain). A half chicken is the only size you can order. Sides…
Finally, Houston Has Its Very Own Financial-Meltdown Icon
Houston has been pining since the Enron days. There’s been a whole economic collapse going on, and it seemed like it was passing us by.Not in terms of job losses, of course, although we’re doing better than most. But if there are shady businessmen about bilking people out of billions,…
Post-Valentine’s Day Relationship Rescue Songs
So Valentine’s Day is over, and you spent all your dough on Cupid swag for that special sweetie, which hopefully bought your way out of the doghouse for the time being. But if not, Casanova, your Rocks Off homies still have your back – provided you have an iTunes account…
The Interior Designers Are Fighting! In Texas!
Austin will be the scene for what no doubt will be a very tasteful demonstration and briefing tomorrow, as a little-known civil war between interior designers bursts into the open.The Institute of Justice, an ACLU-like legal organization, is working with interior designers in Texas to stop what the call “the…
Free 7″ from Room 101
Local/Chicago one-man noisenik Room 101 isn’t letting a silly thing like the economic crisis stop him from releasing music – he’s just decided to give it away. Email him at robface1@hotmail.com and he’ll send you a copy of his brand-new four-song 7″, complete with artwork by Winston Smith, who doctored…
Gothtopia: Awen’s The Bells Before Dawn
Awen. After seeing the Dallas goth-folk group play its sole Houston performance in 2006 opening up for Verdandi (the neo-folk side project of Asmodeus X’s Paul Fredric), I could only assume that Awen was a pagan-y word meaning “to leave boot prints in the colons of all who witness.” There…
One Of Our Turkeys Of The Year Might Be Impeached
A state rep from Fort Worth has called for the impeachment of Sharon Keller, the chief justice of the Criminal Court of Appeals.Rep. Lon Burnam wants her taken to task for the infamous incident in 2007 where she closed the court’s offices sharply at 5 pm, even though a lawyer…
Radar Eyes: Hangin’ With the Homopolice
Hello and welcome back to Radar Eyes. I’ve been away for the last three weeks… Our Focus = Underground/ Unreleased/ Underexposed/ Misunderstood/ Unappreciated/ Etc., etc. I am Chemical Mange. R.I.P. Sandor Benczedi. Welcome Beau Beasley of Homopolice, Heavy Leather Records, etc. Radar Eyes: You are a Houston music institution and…
Flavors of the 5th: Burt’s Meat Market & Cajun Foods
“That pan sausage from Burt’s is fabulous,” Marcus Davis, the owner of the Breakfast Klub said. He’s not alone in his opinion. Many people think the pan sausage at Burt’s Meat Market is the best breakfast sausage in Houston. The sixty year-old Cajun-Creole meat market is located in the Fifth…
UPDATED: Astros Doctor Can’t Follow Tender, Delicate Team PLUS Spring Training Updates
The Houston Astros signed Mike Hampton earlier this off-season. Mike Hampton has not pitched a complete season of baseball since 2004. And last season they signed Kaz Matsui who gets injured while standing still. Brandon Backe and Chris Sampson have had major arm surgeries. Carlos Lee is returning from injury…
UPDATED: Astros Doctor Can’t Follow Tender, Delicate Team PLUS Spring Training Updates
The Houston Astros signed Mike Hampton earlier this off-season. Mike Hampton has not pitched a complete season of baseball since 2004. And last season they signed Kaz Matsui who gets injured while standing still. Brandon Backe and Chris Sampson have had major arm surgeries. Carlos Lee is returning from injury…
OMG SALMA HAYEK BREASTFEEDING WTF!?!
OMG OMG OMG Salma Hayek breast fed a baby in Sierra Leone OMG OMG OMG! Seriously, what is this, the next Yalta Conference? You would think so, given the reaction of the popular and not-so-popular press. Google “Salma Hayek breastfeeding” and you’ll get such lovely quotes and comments as “Lucky…
Your Chance To Drive A Top-Of-The-Line Dragster
If you’ve ever wanted to race a full-blown, 8,000-horsepower NHRA dragster down the strip, this crummy economy is giving you the chance. If you can afford it.Urs Erbacher, who as you well know is a four-time drag-racing champ, is offering to train drag fans at his Baytown facility and then…
Another Week, Another Kind Of Traffic-Ticket Crackdown
This week brings a new crackdown for drivers — a while back it was HPD and “not signalling when changing lanes”; this week it’s a bunch of law enforcement agencies and the “move over” law.The “move over” law requires drivers to slow down or change lanes if they come up…
Today’s Morning Video: A Police Beatdown
Today’s video fun comes to us through KHOU, which exclusively got its hands on a dashboard video of two Santa Fe cops beating the shit out of guy. Or, as one of the cops later put it in a hallway conversation caught on a security camera, “We fucked him up.”Here’s…
Councilmember Lovell’s Neighborhood Feud
It’s an odd thing when the front door of a city councilmember’s home is festooned with bright, urgent notices from the city’s building-permit department. In the case of Councilmember Sue Lovell, that’s only where the oddness starts.A loyal Hair Balls reader earlier today emailed a photo of Houston Lovell’s front…
Tonight: Original Sin Burlesque at House of Blues
What’s the secret of a good burlesque dance? Well, choreography, costumes, agility, flexibility and old-fashioned seductiveness all have their place, of course, but it would be a poor burlesque show indeed without the proper strip-worthy tunes. Perhaps you can pick up a few pointers from tonight’s featured performer Cardinal Cyn,…
Tonight: Morrissey Listening Party at Jet Lounge
Morrissey’s back in record stores tomorrow with Years of Refusal, his first album since 2006’s Ringleader of the Tormentors and possibly his hardest-rocking album to date. (Its release on primo Americana label Lost Highway only adds to the weirdness factor.) The thick-ass bass and snarling guitars of songs like “Something…
Time For Another Round-Up Of All The Traffic Scofflaws
Houston cops have been free and easy with the traffic tickets lately, and now city officials are making sure they get that cash.The city announced yet another “warrant round-up,” where cops come knocking on your door or into your cubicle to drag you away for unpaid tickets. It also gives…
Tonight: Big Brass Bravo! at Tlaquepaque Plaza
Tonight, for free, you can see a very different battle of the bands at Tlaquepaque Plaza, the boho Telephone Road shopping center home to Bohemeo’s and the East End Urban Market. Part of the Houston Institute for Culture’s “Houston Meet Houston” program, Big Brass Bravo! pits the Mariachi MECA faculty…
Success Of Galveston’s Mardi Gras Opening Is In The Eye Of The Beholder
Galveston kicked off Mardi Gras this weekend, and depending on who you talk to, it was either a wild success or a milder version of past pre-Lenten festivities. RoShelle Gaskins, spokesperson for the visitor’s bureau, told Hair Balls, “With the weather and everything we really saw the typical crowd.” She…
Balls Deep In a Hands Up Flame War/Caption Contest
Noted local music scene provacateur Jacob Calle, who is fond of bicycling down Westheimer or strolling hurricane-tossed beaches in a bear costume (above), as well as many other semi-hazardous activities, is once again stirring up trouble in a most hilarious fashion – although, it should be pointed out, he’s not exactly the instigator…
The Rockets Get Some Times Love, The Only Love They Apparently Can
The Houston Rockets are quickly becoming an afterthought in town as Spring Training opens and their tedious soap-opera mediocrity gets pushed to the sidelines. (All of which will change in a blink, of course, if they put together a streak.)But they’re getting noticed elsewhere.The New York Times’ Sunday magazine’s cover…
The Rockets Get Some Times Love, The Only Love They Apparently Can
The Houston Rockets are quickly becoming an afterthought in town as Spring Training opens and their tedious soap-opera mediocrity gets pushed to the sidelines. (All of which will change in a blink, of course, if they put together a streak.)But they’re getting noticed elsewhere.The New York Times’ Sunday magazine’s cover…
The Rockets Get Some Times Love, The Only Love They Apparently Can
The Houston Rockets are quickly becoming an afterthought in town as Spring Training opens and their tedious soap-opera mediocrity gets pushed to the sidelines. (All of which will change in a blink, of course, if they put together a streak.)But they’re getting noticed elsewhere.The New York Times’ Sunday magazine’s cover…
Turning the Screw: Dustin Prestige, Kid Cudi, King Tut, Rick Ross/50 Cent, Ludacris, Lil’ Kim, T.I./Chris Brown, Fat Pat and More
Welcome back to Turning the Screw, Rocks Off’s weekly rap post. It probably won’t rhyme, at least most of the time. E-mail tips to introducingliston@gmail.com. Thanks, homies. Single of the Week: “Dope,” Dustin Prestige Wire To Wire Kid Cudi was tasered at an NBA All-Star Game party in Phoenix for…
HISD Actually Gets Some Good Grades On A Statewide Report
Some good news for the Houston school district — it is kicking the asses of other urban districts in the state when it comes to meeting the high standards of the National Center for Educational Accountability.NCEA, though its Just For Kids organization, has released its annual study of schools who…
Get Lit: On the Road with the Ramones
From their 1974 live debut in New York City to their final 1996 show in L.A., eight bruddas in leather have claimed the surname Ramone. But if there were a ninth member of the punk-rock godfathers, he would of course be Monte Ramone. For 2,263 performances in front of crowds…
Nightlife Photos: Valentine’s Day Drinking at Avant Garden and La Strada
Who needs a date when you’ve got two booty-shaking options catty-corner from each other on Westheimer? Click the pics for more. 12:20 a.m. at Avant Garden 1 a.m. at La Strada…
Oh Baby, Baby–King Cake
It’s King Cake season from now until Mardis Gras. We got this one at the Whole Foods on Magazine Street in New Orleans. The little baby looked sort of lonely out there naked in the cold. The little figurine of a baby used to be stuck inside the King Cake…
Uncanny Ricochet Heralds Aeros Victory
Photo by Fred TraskMitch Love head-butts the puck into the goal. You usually only see that in soccer. The Houston Aeros don’t depend on Mitch Love for scoring goals. They depend on him for muscle. For being physical. For throwing the occasional punch when needed. But they don’t depend on…
Uncanny Ricochet Heralds Aeros Victory
Photo by Fred TraskMitch Love head-butts the puck into the goal. You usually only see that in soccer. The Houston Aeros don’t depend on Mitch Love for scoring goals. They depend on him for muscle. For being physical. For throwing the occasional punch when needed. But they don’t depend on…
Houstonian Survives First Day Of Amazing-ness
Houstonian Jodi Wincheski and her partner have (apparently) survived to live another day on The Amazing Race.The reality-Tv show’s 14th season premiered last night, and Wincheski was on one of the teams, partnered with a fellow Southwest Airlines flight attendant.According to this report, they came close to being eliminated but…
What That Fireball Really Was
The fireball over Texas — the one that is earning breathless reports in papers all over the world — was either a piece of debris from that satellite collision or it wasn’t, depending on who’s answering the question.We already have established that the satellite collision can likely be traced to…
More Job Cuts At The Houston Chronicle
There’s no way around it: It’s a sucky time to be a journalist these days. The latest evidence comes from the Houston Chronicle, which is telling its people to expect even more job cutsHere’s the memo: As our newspaper continues to report the condition of the economy, we read about…
Montrose Makes Way for Vinoteca Poscol
The rumors flew when beloved Belgian restaurant Cafe Montrose closed late last year after Hurricane Ike. Patrons hungry for their fix of moules, frites and Chimay were baffled when they pulled into the parking lot one day to find it “temporarily closed.” The confusion grew when the temporary closure stretched into days and weeks, eventually…
Adios Otilia’s? Not So Fast.
Strict dress code at Otilia’s. Word hit the streets this week that Otilia’s, the venerable restaurant on Long Point which has served old-fashioned interior Mexican cuisine for almost twenty years, was on the auction block. Restaurant, employees and recipes — all reportedly for sale. And, predictably, longtime fans and patrons…
Hangover Brunch at the Hotel Galvez
Hangover brunch sounds a bit juvenile, come to think of it. But let’s be honest: if you’re staying overnight in Galveston on one of the upcoming Mardi Gras weekends, chances are that you aren’t going to be feeling 100% the next morning. If that sounds like you — or even…
It’s Mardi Gras Time In Galveston
Mardi Gras organizers hope for big crowds of revelers over the next two weeks to help rejuvenate Galveston and show people that the island is, in fact, still there. “It’s going to be a bigger and better event this year as compared to last year,” RoShelle Gaskins, spokesperson for the…
Five Tweeting Musicians Worth Following
Boy oh boy, Rocks Off is getting carried away with this Twitter business. As addictive as it is, though, it’s not without its disappointments. We were amazed and flattered when Bjork decided to follow us, and then just a little heartbroken when a quick glance at her tweets en masse…
Guilty Of Medicaid Fraud? Depends
If you’re going to try to defraud the government, please — for your own self-esteem — choose a more glamorous plan than one involving adult diapers.When the announcement came in from the US Attorney’s Office headlined that a local company owner had been “INDICTED IN ADULT DIAPER FRAUD CASE,” we…
At Least This Financial-Scandal Houstonian Is More Eccentric Than Ken Lay
Bloomberg is reporting that the Houston-based Stanford Group Co. is under investigation by the Feds. In the aftermath of the Bernie Madoff scandal, both the Securities and Exchange Commission and the Financial Industry Regulatory Authority want to know how Stanford can keep paying out 4.5 percent returns on its CDs…
Follow Friday for Foodies
The group collective on Twitter, the increasingly popular micro-blogging and social networking platform, has developed a recent tradition called Follow Friday. Follow Friday is part circle jerk, part honest and helpful advice from your Twitter friends on who to follow if you’re new or simply looking to expand your circle…
The Scientifically Engineered Worst Song in the World
Crazy science, will you ever learn? Just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you should. Sure, we could start transplanting monkey heads on humans, but you shouldn’t. The atom bomb sure as hell ended World War II, but it began an era of atomic fear and guilt. We ended…
Damn, It Feels Good To Be A Banker
Financial crisis? What financial crisis?Not in Texas, apparently. And not for bankers.Bankers descended on Austin this week for Bank Legislation Day, which doesn’t sound as fun as the Bank Holidays they have in England.The Texas bankers, though, want the world to know that they are nothing like those other banks…
Aftermath: Annuals at Walter’s On Washington
If you could squeeze music from the udders of a cow, pour it a cup, mix in equal parts chocolate sauce and broken up pieces of stained glass stolen from the Vatican, drink it while on the down-slope of a roller-coaster, go home and sit on the back-porch and listen…
Guy Discovers Months Later His Car Wasn’t Stolen, Just Impounded
On December 1, Jesse Elliot walked out of his apartment and realized his tricked-out Honda Accord – the car he loved – had been stolen. Jesse missed his morning classes at Universal Technical Institute, where he took mechanic classes, to file a report with the Precinct 4 Constable’s Office. That…
Las Problemas con Las Alamedas
No matter what you may think of the food, there’s no denying that the nearly three decade old Las Alamedas — that familiar pink stucco sight along Katy Freeway — has one of the most beautiful spaces in town. With soaring ceilings, intricate wrought iron, a gorgeous antique mahogany bar, expansive paintings…
Breaking News: Cops Don’t Like Being Told They’re Fat
So far, no one’s pointed to any evidence linking lack of physical fitness among some Houston Police Department officers with problems like the disproportionate Tasering of minorities, the shootings of quite a few mentally ill folks, or even the supreme fuck-up that put an innocent man in prison for six…
W’s First Post-Presidental Speech Is In The Houston Of Canada
George W. Bush’s office has announced his first public appearance since January 20, and it’s in the place most people consider to be the Houston of the North — Calgary.Calgary, and the surrounding province of Alberta, is oil land and politically conservative. Lots of oil execs shuttle back and forth…
Terrible News For Lovers Of Texas History, Or Just Biography In General
Anyone who considers themselves a Texan — one that likes to read, at any rate — should be federally mandated to read the three volumes in which Robert Caro traces the life of Lyndon Johnson.The first book, Path to Power, is a fascinating primer on the Hill Country, on Sam…
Five Spot: OHMYGOD MC HAMMER AND VANILLA ICE ARE DOING A REUNION SHOW!!!
Welcome back to Five Spot. Every Friday, we’ll examine a recent bit of music news and list five reasons why it’s either brilliant or dumb-assed. Send tips to introducingliston@gmail.com. Dude? Dude. Dude! Growing up there were two things that we prayed nightly for: (1) some sly, sly movie producer to…
Slideshow: Houston Twestival at Caroline Collective
Last night at Caroline Collective, hundreds of Houston Tweeters gathered for charity, conversation and music. Mark C. Austin brought back plenty of photos. Follow us on Twitter here…
Flashback: Wayside Drive at Twestival Houston
Caroline Collective was all a-Twitter at Thursday’s Twestival, featuring music by local alt-rockers Wayside Drive and more. Click here for a slideshow…
Erin Andrews: Playboy’s Sexiest Sportscaster
The competition has ended, and just like the Philadelphia Phillies putting down the upstart Tampa Bay Rays in last year’s World Series, ESPN Erin Andrews’ dominated her competition once again to repeat as Playboy.com’s Sexiest Sportscaster. Playboy.com attempted to toughen things up this year, so they made it a two-step…
Erin Andrews: Playboy’s Sexiest Sportscaster
The competition has ended, and just like the Philadelphia Phillies putting down the upstart Tampa Bay Rays in last year’s World Series, ESPN Erin Andrews’ dominated her competition once again to repeat as Playboy.com’s Sexiest Sportscaster. Playboy.com attempted to toughen things up this year, so they made it a two-step…
Friday The 13th: The Best Kills
Today marks the reboot of the venerated Friday the 13th franchise, and what better way to get up to speed on the history of Jason Voorhees and Camp Crystal Lake than to study this carefully assembled list of the best death scenes from each of the 11 Ft13 flicks?Friday the…
Horndogs, Don’t Bother Rushing To That Kama Sutra-Based Yoga Class
When Hair Balls heard that Jenny Yoga was hosting this weekend’s Kama Sutra Dance Journey, where students could learn “dance movements directly culled from the Kama Sutra,” our brain began to spin with images: a room full of dancers “penetrating the eye,” “climbing the tree,” doing “the gazelle and the…
Album of the Day: Willie Nelson & Asleep at the Wheel’s Willie and the Wheel
Willie Nelson & Asleep at the Wheel Willie and the Wheel www.willieandthewheel.com The late Jerry Wexler, who passed away last August at age 91, was best known as an advocate and producer for top R&B and soul artists like Ray Charles, Aretha Franklin and Wilson Pickett. But Wexler was also…
Cheap Sex Ideas For A Recession Valentine’s
It’s the day before Valentine’s Day, the dismal economy has you strapped for cash and you haven’t the slightest idea what to get your special someone.Where can you find true love on a budget? We asked some sex-toy experts. Cynthia Rodriguez is the regional manager for Cindie’s stores; Geneva Rogers…
West U Doesn’t Want Its Rec Center To Attract Outsiders, Maybe
West University is building a new recreation center on Bellaire Boulevard. And according to this West U Examiner article, the crappy economy sure is working out for those can’t-catch-a-break West U residents, bringing in plenty of low construction bids. Turns out, though, that the new rec center won’t have basketball…
Pizza Comparison: Part One–Original Brooklyn Grimaldi’s
Walking across the Brooklyn Bridge, a New York food writer asked me, “Is the Grimaldi’s in Houston as good as the Grimaldi’s in Brooklyn, or did they just license the name?” I told her that was the very question we were on our way to answering. It was also a…
Tonight: Pat MacDonald and Melanie Jane at the Continental Club
The only thing more disheartening than being a one-hit wonder is having your one hit’s lyrical intentions misconstrued from here to eternity. Bruce Springsteen didn’t write “Born in the USA” as patriotic anthem, but Ronald Reagan sure thought he did. Pat MacDonald, formerly of Austin’s Timbuk 3, knows this reality…
Downtown Has A Green Skyscraper
There’s something new in Downtown — a building that can officially be called “green.”The 33-story tower at 717 Texas (you know, the block with the Longhorn Cafe) has won LEED Certification from the U.S. Green Building Council.It received a Silver Certificate for existing buildings for doing such things as having…
A Houston Connection To That Mumbai Terror Attack
It’s a bright day of publicity for one Houston firm — they’re getting written up in papers and on websites all over the globe.On the other hand, they’re getting written up for a (somewhat tenuous) connection with the horrific terrorist attacks in Mumbai last year, so it’s not an unvarnished…
Roger Clemens vs. Brian McNamee: Dismissed (Mostly)
As happened so many times in his career, when it came to clutch time, Roger Clemens has failed to deliver. U.S. District Court Judge Keith Ellison today dismissed most of Roger Clemens’ defamation suit against Brian McNamee, Clemens’ former trainer. Ellison partially dismissed the suit on jurisdictional issues, ruling that…
Roger Clemens vs. Brian McNamee: Dismissed (Mostly)
As happened so many times in his career, when it came to clutch time, Roger Clemens has failed to deliver. U.S. District Court Judge Keith Ellison today dismissed most of Roger Clemens’ defamation suit against Brian McNamee, Clemens’ former trainer. Ellison partially dismissed the suit on jurisdictional issues, ruling that…
Oh, Christ: Original Limp Bizkit Lineup to Reunite
Because things aren’t already bad enough out there right now, the original lineup of crotch-rocking mooks Limp Bizkit annouced today they are reuniting. Here, according to a joint statement by the band’s Fred Durst and Wes Borland, is their reasoning: “We decided we were more disgusted and bored with the state…
An Opera About Houston’s Anna Nicole Smith? Why The Hell Not?
World, you have waited long enough — you are finally getting your Anna Nicole Smith opera.Britain’s Royal Opera House has announced it will produce an opera based on the life of Houston’s favorite stripper/golddigger/Rusty Hardin antagonist in 2011.The libretto will be written by the guy who did Jerry Springer, The…
Idol Beat, Part 2: Still More Hollywood Week
DAY 5 This new Idol concept – a lushly appointed “judges’ mansion” where contestants on thin ice are forced to sing for their survival – was squandered, somewhat, by the producers. I mean, this was a two-hour show, and really, there was time to make it a bit wacky, with…
Around Town With Jay Francis
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Maybe I-45 Isn’t One Of The Deadliest Stretches Of Highway
Commuters in the Woodlands, UH students, Galveston day trippers, people driving to Dallas for some reason, and any number of other Houston motorists – congratulations on cheating death!According to Fox News, I-45 in Harris County ranks fifth in a list of the 10 most dangerous stretches of highway in America…
An Interview With The Vet Who Almost Killed Houston’s World-Famous Dog
Texas A&M vet Katherine Snyder saved the life of Stump — Houston’s most famous dog — about four years ago. The first time she saw the dog, he was close to death, “lethargic and depressed” and had already spent a week in a Houston clinic. “We all talked about it,…
Tonight: Twestival Houston at Caroline Collective
Tonight at Caroline Collective, Houston will be joining over 175 cities across the world for the Twestival. The Twitter-spawned event was set-up to benefit Charity:Water, a nonprofit group that helps build wells in underdeveloped countries to help bring fresh water to their communities. The all-volunteer event begins tonight at 5:30…
Valero Gets Fined For A Damn Impressive Bit Of Polluting
If you’ve ever pondered how much pollution an oil refinery can spew out in 4,008 hours and 50 minutes when the gasoline-making process goes wrong, Valero Refining in Texas City has provided an answer: — 345,624 pounds of sulfur dioxide– 3,752.30 pounds of hydrogen sulfide– 63.30 pounds of of nitrogen oxidesCompared…
Free Tickets for Le Freak/M80’s Tonight at House of Blues
These fine-looking gentlemen are Le Freak, the Metroplex’s premier disco-era cover (or, sorry, “tribute”) band, sort of like Houston’s Disco Expressions with better wigs and fewer personnel. They and their North Texas buds the M80’s – aka Molly and the Ringwalds with Bowie wigs and no women – are taking time off from…
NASA Killed A Cancer Cure, Suit Alleges
The world may have known a cure to cancer … if only that darn Columbia space shuttle didn’t disintegrate over Texas six years ago and if only NASA had been a little more careful taking care of the cargo and debris that landed back on earth.At least that’s what a…
Adios Skyline Network
One of Houston’s principal sources for news, reviews and gossip about the local music scene has gone dark. Visitors to the Skyline Network this morning – we’d normally link to it, but there’s not much point now – were greeted with the above image and a message from Webmaster adr…
Idol Beat, Part 1: More Hollywood Week
You thought the funeral was over? You thought all those tears were dried up? You were wrong, my friends – so very, very wrong. Aye, verily, the bloodletting continued unabated as Hollywood Week wound down. Hey, Ryan Seacrest warned us at the outset: “The stakes are as high as they’ve…
For Valentine’s Day: The Five Best Romantic-Comedy Moments
So you’ve decided to go the lame-ass “dinner and a movie” route for Valentine’s Day, only you can’t get even get a reservation at the 59 Diner and going to the movies these days just makes you wish you’d applied for that concealed handgun permit. Buck up, little camper, for…
Miguel Tejada Offers Scant Contrition, Scurries Away Like Scalded Dog
Miguel Tejada faced the press yesterday and took the coward’s way out. Crying and stumbling over his words, Tejada confessed his sorrow for not telling Congressional investigators that he knew of another player that took steroids. Tejada and his posse, including his attorney Mark Tuohey, refused to accept questions from…
Miguel Tejada Offers Scant Contrition, Scurries Away Like Scalded Dog
Miguel Tejada faced the press yesterday and took the coward’s way out. Crying and stumbling over his words, Tejada confessed his sorrow for not telling Congressional investigators that he knew of another player that took steroids. Tejada and his posse, including his attorney Mark Tuohey, refused to accept questions from…
Cutout Bin: Everything You’ve Always Wanted to Know About Home Computers
Everything You’ve Always Wanted To Know About Home Computers Narrated by Steve Allen & Jayne Meadows, 1983 The kids just wouldn’t shut up about it. You gave in. You made the purchase. You brought it home. Now the brand new TRS-80 microcomputer is sitting on the floor amidst a pile…
Current Television Shows That Premiered When I Was Still A Virgin
The other day I had a random thought: When “COPS” first aired, wasn’t, like, Jimmy Carter the president? Dang. I just went back and checked. That show premiered when I was in junior high. JUNIOR HIGH. Do you know how long ago that was? I’m not ashamed to say I’m…
Don’t Get A Toothache If You’ve Got Jury Duty In Galveston County
A League City woman has been found in contempt of court and fined $100 because she got a toothache during a trial on which she was a juror, the Galveston County Daily News reports.It wasn’t so much she got the toothache and needed surgery; it was more that she told…
Satellite Collision: Red-Light Cameras To Blame?
NASA has announced that one of its satellites has collided with a Russian satellite, creating a cloud of space debris that threatens other space objects.They did not say whether red-light cameras played any part in the collision.Scientists say, however, that satellites have never collided in the 50-odd years of them…
Inprint Margarett Root Brown Reading Series: Ha Jin
When Ha Jin, then a doctoral student at Brandeis University, witnessed the Chinese Tiananmen Square massacre on television, he decided that he and his young family would never return to their homeland. Making a decision like this, for most, would be challenge enough for a lifetime. But Jin took on…
“Paper Ballet: Kelly Price-Colston”
Chaos theory tells us that while some things might seem random, nothing actually is. We learn the same thing in the exhibit “Paper Ballet: Kelly Price-Colston.” Press materials for the show indicate the exhibit is “about questioning the ‘ballet’ of chaos that surrounds us in the modern world.” Price-Colston’s paintings,…
Brentano String Quartet
Poetry and music are like chocolate and caramel. Separate, they’re terrific; combined, they’re divine. The two unite today with Da Camera’s presentation of the Brentano String Quartet with baritone Leon Williams, who will perform works inspired by poetry. The Quartet has built a reputation for performing outside the standard repertoire…
“A Jewel Encrusted Pathology”
“A Jewel Encrusted Pathology” is just as much about the space as the art. Megan Whitenton and co-exhibitor Alicia Seale turned ArtStorm’s gallery into a mock apartment with couches, chairs, end tables and housewares. “[We’re] trying to encourage people to hang out among all the artwork,” says Whitenton. The purpose,…
The National Acrobats of China
The National Acrobats of China have been wowing audiences around the world for 50 years. Today, it’s our turn. Thirty-five athletes, expert in martial arts, acrobatics and illusion, take the stage performing seemingly impossible feats. Set to traditional Chinese music, the routines include cycling, tricks, plate-spinning, juggling and, of course,…
Maggie Nicols, Fred Frith and Susan Alcorn
Nameless Sound presents three experimental musicians, Maggie Nicols, Fred Frith and Susan Alcorn, in their first-ever collaborative work. Houston native Alcorn is celebrated by country music and experimental sound fans alike for her twisted twang. Frith has rocked avant-garde style with the likes of John Zorn and Brian Eno. Nicols…
Pilobolus Dance Theater
With a program full of twisting, turning and tumbling choreography, Pilobolus Dance Theater (named after a barnyard fungus!) is making just one Houston concert appearance this year. The troupe’s work has been called “liquefied acrobatics.” Pilobolus charms audiences with its limber “odd beauty” and “lyric poetry,” as The New York…
Houston Zoo: Wild for Love
Courtship is pretty much the same for turtles, gorillas or humans. The males show off — for a turtle it’s stretching his neck — and the females choose the best prospect. At today’s Wild for Love, Houston Zoo Director Rick Barongi details the mating rituals of various members of the…
Free Day at the Zoo
President’s Day doesn’t get the attention it used to, but one Houston institution finds it cause enough to throw open its door and forget about the admission fee. As its title might imply, the Free Day at the Zoo gets you free admission to all the exhibits, demonstrations and keeper…
The Odd Couple
You have your choice of slobs this weekend — two local theater groups are performing Neil Simon’s The Odd Couple. The Katy Visual and Performing Arts Center is presenting an updated, female rendition, while Texas Repertory Theatre is going for the standard male version. Cast with women or men, the…
Truck Turner
Very few people can embody a character named Truck — Isaac Hayes is one. In Truck Turner, Hayes plays a bounty hunter who’s chasing a lowlife named Gator. Unfortunately for Truck (and for Gator too), Gator is killed before he can be brought in. Gator’s girlfriend takes the death of…
Love Bugs
Add a little heat to your Valentine’s Day with a night of salsa dancing and mixing at Love Bugs. Along with a live band, appetizers and a cash bar, Love Bugs has an environment that features dinosaurs (or what’s left of them, at least) and a tropical rainforest. 6 to…
Labyrinth
The local Alamo Drafthouse has decided Austin can’t have all the fun — it’s bringing in the classic Jim Henson film Labyrinth to Houston, and Shuttle Debris is providing live music. (The fantasy film features a girl who wishes her baby brother into another world, and has to solve a…
Compleat Female Stage Beauty
When you’re a 17th-century boy who likes boys and plays girls’ roles in the theater, the last thing you need is the boys’ artistic monopoly on female characters getting revoked on the whim of a monarch. That’s where thespian Ned Kynaston finds himself in Compleat Female Stage Beauty, the latest…
American Homebrewers Association Rally
Spend the afternoon with some fellow beer lovers at the American Homebrewers Association Rally. Saint Arnold’s Brewery is playing host, and the agenda includes brewery tours, face time with brewery owner Brock Wagner, home brewing demos, munchies and cask beer for everyone. Oh, and your admission fee includes a year’s…
Children’s Classes at the Houston Arboretum and Nature Center
The Houston Arboretum and Nature Center’s outdoor laboratory is a great way for your little naturalist to learn about the animal world. During February classes, the Tadpole Troopers (three-, four- and five-year-olds) investigate all things armadillo, while the Naturalist Explorers (five-to-eight-year-olds) explore the ways animals use speed to their advantage…
Valentine’s Day Family Festival
The American Heart Association isn’t in the romance business. Neither is the Health Museum, so during today’s Valentine’s Day Family Festival, instead of getting kisses, you explore arteries. And instead of hugs, you’ll get tips on how to keep your heart healthy. Scavenger hunts, craft and cooking activities are planned…
Brendan McNally: Germania
Texas author Brendan McNally has a complex, funny and unusual story to tell in his latest release, Germania. Set in Germany (the title kinda gives it away, doesn’t it?), it’s the story of four brothers during WWII. Once a popular vaudeville act, they’re separated by the war, and each takes…
Houston Antiques Dealers Association Spring Show & Sale
There’s lots more to the Houston Antiques Dealers Association Spring Show & Sale than old tables and chairs. Sure, some 170 dealers offering art, furniture, jewelry and glass have set up shop, turning the George R. Brown Convention Center into a giant market. But you can also drop in to…
Pablo Francisco
Catch comedian Pablo Francisco before he jets off for his European tour or gets too busy filming his Comedy Center special to spend any time onstage. It’s not so much the punch lines that draw people to his shows; it’s Francisco’s ability to impersonate famous characters that’s made him popular…
Guided Night Hikes
During today’s Guided Night Hike, when something goes bump in the night, it’s part of the plan. If hiking at night seems a little counterintuitive, that’s the point — getting out in the woods when usually nobody’s around and all the animals are in action mode. Visitors who have gone…
Houston Center for Photography Print Auction
You’ve had a couple of weeks to inspect the goods — now it’s time to pull out your wallet. The Houston Center for Photography Print Auction is here, and auctioneer Rick Wester is ready to take your bid. Artists, collectors and galleries from around the world have donated photographic art…
Classical Theatre Company: The Triumph of Love
French playwright Pierre de Marivaux hasn’t enjoyed the same long-term success his contemporaries Molière and Racine have, but that doesn’t stop Houston’s Classical Theatre Company from presenting his work. Today they’ll partner with Brazos Bookstore for a staged reading of one of Marivaux’s more popular works — The Triumph of…
Mike Epps’s Valentine’s Day Comedy Explosion
If you subscribe to the theory that laughter between lovers leads to…well, all the stuff lovers do on Valentine’s Day, then be advised to grab a date for the Mike Epps’s Valentine’s Day Comedy Explosion, where laughter is a sure thing. The seasoned comedian began building his reputation on the…
Galveston Mardi Gras
For 12 days, the word “hurricane” will refer to a sticky-sweet alcoholic concoction, not a swirling windstorm, as some 250,000 fun-seekers take to the Strand and its surroundings to eat, drink and generally do everything their mothers told them not to. Thank you, Galveston Mardi Gras! The raucous, wide-ranging celebrations…
2009 St. Andrew’s Episcopal Celtic Festival
The sound of bagpipes will lead you to the 2009 St. Andrew’s Episcopal Celtic Festival and the “kirking of the Tartans” (that means presenting the cloths, each woven with distinct patterns for its clan, to the church). Dancers, musicians, singers and an award-winning pipe band entertain you all afternoon, while…
Learn at Lunch
Get a taste of Japanese culture today during the Learn at Lunch series presentation by Carl Rosa, executive director of the Japan-American Society – Houston. His reflections on Japan, an ultramodern country with an ancient history, take care of the “learn” part of the event. The “lunch” part happens during…
Nursery School Musical
No doubt the first day of school can be traumatic for kids. In Nursery School Musical, we see it’s stressful for overly ambitious parents, too. Fresh from a successful turn at the 2008 Toronto Fringe Festival, Nursery is making its U.S. premiere with this production. The satire takes a hard…
The Odd Couple
You have your choice of slobs this weekend — two local theater groups are performing Neil Simon’s The Odd Couple. The Katy Visual and Performing Arts Center is presenting an updated, female rendition, while Texas Repertory Theatre is going for the standard male version. Cast with women or men, the…
Manil Suri: The Age of Shiva
Shiva is the Hindu god of destruction and transformation. You’ll have to read the book before you decide which one is played out in Manil Suri’s novel The Age of Shiva. You can get a hint at Suri’s reading and discussion today, but we’re going to guess that he’ll tell…
At Home at the Zoo
Stories don’t always start at the beginning. It turns out Edward Albee’s The Zoo Story started somewhere in the middle. Albee’s At Home at the Zoo, a prequel to the play, takes us back to the start, before showing us The Zoo Story again. A Zoo Story, you remember, follows…
Bourne-Kylián-Walsh: A Masterful Mixed Repertoire
Since this weekend includes Saint Valentine’s Day, how would you like to fall in love with a swan? Not a sweet cygnet, mind you, all frilly and pink, but a big, powerful trumpeter cob full of power, strength and loads of animal magnetism? That’s what happens to the hapless Prince…
Houston Heritage Luncheon
This year’s speakers at the Houston Heritage Luncheon, Leslie and Leigh Keno, spend most of their time surrounded by beautiful things. But then again, everyone does. The difference? While we see a dusty old chair, the Keno brothers see a connection to America’s history, a blending of function, aesthetics and…
Texas Home & Garden Show
Go green at the Texas Home & Garden Show today. More than a thousand professionals, builders, designers and experts will be ready to give you the latest information on environmentally friendly products and practices. And you’ll have more than 50 workshops and demonstrations to choose from, just in case you…
M. Ward: Hold Time
Following his recent success with Zooey Deschanel partnership She & Him, M. Ward continues his path down the AM Gold aesthetic with Hold Time, his sixth proper record. A hallmark of Ward’s sound is a very timeless feel that, productionwise, could be from the early to mid-1900s, and arrangementwise, he…
Oyster Lovers Unite: Five Places to Eat Oysters This Valentine’s Weekend
Joyce’s Seafood & Steaks 6415 San Felipe, 713-975-9902 Formerly known as Joyce’s Oyster Resort, this blue and turquoise nautically themed hangout is a great destination for oyster lovers. $7.25 a dozen Captain Benny’s Half Shell Oyster Bar 8506 S. Main, 713-666-5469 The old-time favorite among oyster eaters and still one…
Selecting The Proper Valentine’s Day Soundtrack
Feeling crazy in love this Valentine’s Day? Well, his or her mix CD better include some great love songs. Recently dumped? Then you’re probably listening to some songs that help you wallow in your miserable heartache. As for the rest of us? The ones who know whom we love, but…
Eat like an Egyptian at Palms Cafe
Hawawshi (ha-WOW-shi) ($6) is a traditional Egyptian dish, and you’ll only find it at Palms Cafe (12719 Westheimer, 281-493-9614). It’s a cross between a hamburger, a Mexican gordita and a South American empanada. Ground beef is mixed with garlic, onions and hints of nutmeg and allspice, then formed into a…
Buyer Beware of Confessions of a Shopaholic
The Confessions of a Shopaholic we need right now would be a handheld doc featuring former Merrill Lynch CEO John Thain sobbing into the camera and begging the American public to forgive him for purchasing a $35,000 commode. With its curious release date — the film is meant to be…
The Snake Charmers: Been Gone Too Long
Contrary to popular belief, the blues is mostly about restraint; a few carefully chosen and timed notes are almost always preferable to a shower of technically precise show-offery. Luckily, the Snake Charmers don’t have this problem. The Houston quartet’s latest CD, Been Gone Too Long, opts out of anything flashy,…
Capsule Art Reviews: “Disturbance of Distance,” “Hedwige Jacobs — New Drawings,” Hot and Grounded, “Michael Guidry: How soon is now?,” “Perspectives 164: Stephanie Syjuco: Total Fabrications”
“Disturbance of Distance” Box 13’s current show, curated by Eleanor Williams, brings together a handful of artists for a site-specific exhibition in its two main gallery spaces. While not necessarily linked by a specific theme, each work bears something of an organic or chemical matrix representing growth or consumption. Leslie…
Midgets, Convicts and the Reverend Peyton’s Big Damn Band
The morning after playing a party for his high-school graduation, Josh “Reverend” Peyton woke up with severe pain in his hands. Doctors thought that Peyton, who had been playing guitar for five years, would never play again. “For almost two years, I didn’t play,” Peyton notes. “I ended up having…
Pleasure Cruiser
New York-based artist Paul Villinski has built a really impressive mobile art studio for “Paul Villinski — Emergency Response Studio.” It’s a 30-foot Gulf Stream Cavalier trailer that the artist essentially gutted and transformed into a solar-powered, off-the-grid workspace. It’s outfitted with all the essentials: worktable, toolboxes, compressor, storage for…
Hank III and Assjack
There are three sides to Hank III: Risin’ Outlaw, hellbilly deluxe and black-metal Neanderthal. Each one gets equally represented at his near three-hour live shows — often in that order — with only a brief intermission and wardrobe change to signal the transition. Hank III is clearly a man of…
Capsule Stage Reviews: Arms and the Man, The Man Who Saved New Orleans, The Odd Couple, Taking Flight
Arms and the Man G.B. Shaw’s sparkling romantic comedy from 1894 takes on manly soldiers who are praised for desertion, a middle class as snooty as the upper class, headstrong servants, blustery fools, romantic heroines who save the enemy because they’ve just seen an opera where such a thing happens,…
Frank Sinatra: Seduction: Sinatra Sings of Love
Ten years after his death, Frank Sinatra’s cocksure shadow looms as large as ever over affairs of the heart. Francis Albert was the “world’s preeminent Chief Tilted-Hat Attitudinalist, Swingin’est Rake of Nights Unending [and] a Man for All Men (Whose Women Still Wouldn’t Mind a Piece of Him),” writes The…
Twinkies, Racial Profiling and EaDo
A Web site called the T.W.I.N.K.I.E.S. Project, is, in Internet terms, an ancient classic. A War and Peace of the Web, if you will. When it was posted in — oh, em, gee — 1995, it caused a minor sensation. And it was started by two Rice students, Todd Stadler…
Van Morrison: Astral Weeks Live at the Hollywood Bowl
It’s strange to imagine a Van Morrison concert without “Brown Eyed Girl,” but that was exactly what happened last November, when the Irish-born singer-songwriter played two concerts dedicated to the music of his iconic (and often misunderstood) magnum opus, Astral Weeks. It was the first time Morrison played all that…
BARC, BARC, BARC
Online readers respond to “BARC Sucks,” by Craig Malisow, February 5: This must end: Everyone needs to e-mail this great article to friends and family. Send it to your council member, the mayor, anyone you can think of. The city pound is not an animal shelter, it is a death…
Oyster Lovers Unite
Nearly four inches long, the “Sand Dune” oyster from Prince Edward Island was so plump, it was bulging out of its shell “like a large breast in a small brassiere,” as Rodney Clark, the owner of Rodney’s Oyster House in Toronto, put it. Intensely briny and wonderfully sweet, the big,…
Musicians on Twitter
Saturday night, your musical options include the grinding punk-blues of Austin-based Ohio transplants Heartless Bastards, whose new album The Mountain is drawing raves, at Last Concert Cafe, or the Peaches-like electro-sex raps of Hollywood freaks Punk Bunny (“Cockring,” “Gloryhole”) at Meridian. Of course it’s Valentine’s Day, so the paired-off among…
Oyster Lovers Unite: Oyster Species Guide
There are five species of oysters eaten in the Western world. Crassostrea virginica (C. virginica) Common names: Eastern oyster, Atlantic oyster, Gulf oyster, Blue Point, Malpeque This is the great American oyster, the species that occurs naturally from Canada down the East Coast to New York and Chesapeake Bay and…
Annuals, Jessica Lea Mayfield
An adherent of the “more is more” philosophy, blogosphere darlings Annuals fashion widescreen pop majesties in the image of the Flaming Lips. Like the Lips, the Raleigh, North Carolina, sextet billows with fluffy, kitchen-sink arrangements that sample widely from baroque, twee and indie pop, cooked over a ’70s soft-rock swagger…
What About Lazy Mexicans?
Dear Mexican, I have a question from one Mexican to another: Why do gabachos think we know everything about plants? During conversations with the estadounidenses, I will get asked about plants, pruning, how to keep roses alive, etc. I understand many of my compatriotas working over here are gardeners (and…
H-Town Blues Festival, with Clarence Carter
In bars across South Louisiana, whenever people hear a couple of Morse-code hi-hats followed by the words “When I make love, I don’t just make love…I be strokin’!” they know it’s time to put down their drinks, suspend their conversations and assemble on the dance floor for a curious “Thriller”-like…
The Valentine’s Day Minefield at Central Market
The USDA Prime tenderloin was perfectly grilled and slathered in garlicky chimichurri, just the way my significant other likes it. The herbed shrimp on the side turned it into a “surf and turf” combo. Sides were a perfect round dome of boursin potato soufflé and slightly chewy grilled asparagus. We…
The McKenzies
Roses are red, violets are blue, if you love pop, you’ll heart the McKenzies too. The local foursome is joining in what seems to be a season of album releases in Houston’s indie-rock scene; the group has sandwiched its Valentine’s Day EP release between the Wild Moccasins’ official debut and…
El Taco Tote
Selling $3 tacos in Houston, a town of $1 taco trucks, is a difficult thing, but a new chain out of El Paso has just opened the first of what they hope will be eight or nine restaurants in the Houston area. El Taco Tote (6154 Westheimer, 713-706-3233) bills itself…
Gloria Trevi
So she may have been involved in human trafficking, sexual slavery and other nefarious dealings. So she spent almost a decade of her life either on the run or fighting extradition in a Brazilian jail. So her Web site glaringly omits this entire period in her biography. After all, she…
Unusual Suspects at The Usual
Karaoke performers make you really appreciate musicians. Most of ’em do, anyway. The Saturday-night karaoke affair at The Usual (5519 Allen) features a group of friends screeching Weezer’s “Say It Ain’t So” from beginning to end, two girls manhandling Carrie Underwood’s “Before He Cheats” and a guy talking, not rapping,…
Greg Ginn and the Texas Corrugators
If we were to tell you that one of the most influential guitarists and innovators in the early ’80s hardcore movement was living in the tiny town of Taylor (30 miles outside Austin), you would call us crazy. But that’s where Greg Ginn, founding guitarist of hardcore’s lode-bearing Black Flag,…
The International‘s Assets Are Troubled Indeed
Tom Tykwer’s The International is one of those movies in which shadowy men meet in parked cars, abandoned buildings and inconspicuous public spaces (museum galleries are a particular favorite), travel under assumed names and always glance nervously over their shoulders, fearful of being spied on through a sniper’s lens. Some…
